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Topic: In most countries, multicultural companies and their products become more and more important. This trend is seriously damaging our quality of life. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Topic: In most countries, multicultural companies and their products become more and more important. This trend is seriously damaging our quality of life. 7YL5
Going up with cooperation countries developing, multicultural companies come and produce virtually increasingly, which is more and more important. It plays role in economic and quality of life, the role makes it multifaceted- but not seriously damaging at all. When a multicultural company comes, their products are new things: a better quality, a better experience, a better learning, etc. If a company is good, their products will be welcomed very hard on market. That says, multicultural company increases quality products, it is good mark. User or buyers’ responds are always a visually good sign. When users or buyers give a product a best seller, which urges to domestic producer to advance their quality. The domestic producer has to be into learning and changing progress. Thus, products on market get on improvement- both multicultural and domestic ones. Multicultural company comes, gives foreign direct investment and occupation opportunity to a country. It increases domestic economy, solute job problem. By demand of employees, they educate our worker with high quality and ability. They provides multicultural and equal opportunity input and advancement which do interest to us. By saying that, they help to solute job problem and offer a better working environment. So on, their products give a competitive price which is advantage for users/ buyers. The advantage leads consumption interests which become trends for a job. The job will be developing, economy increases the value. Also, multicultural companies bring various culture from most two sources. A little of them could popularize their culture with product advertisements to people. Employees who works together could affect the culture on each other. These opened culture evenly widely spread on diversified education, news, music, movie investment. It advances our spiritual life. The economic, together with the spiritual life, is foundation to most of life aspects, especially quality of life. Multicultural company makes it. Little multicultural companies could cheat on laws, they could waste our environment or do something even worse, but that is their choice and doing, not featured a trend or jobs.
Going up with cooperation countries developing,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
multicultural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
and produce
virtually
increasingly
, which is more and more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
. It plays role in economic and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
, the role
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
it multifaceted-
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not
seriously
damaging at all.

When a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
multicultural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
, their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
are new things: a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
experience, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
learning, etc. If a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
, their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
will
be welcomed
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
on market. That says,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
multicultural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
increases
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
, it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
mark.

User or buyers’ responds are always a
visually
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sign
. When users or buyers give a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
Use "the" with the superlative.
a
This word is normally spelled as one.
best seller
, which urges to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
domestic
producer to advance their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
domestic
producer
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
be into learning and changing progress.
Thus
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
on market
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
on improvement- both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
multicultural
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
domestic
ones.

Multicultural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
, gives foreign direct investment and occupation opportunity to a country. It increases
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
domestic
economy, solute
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
problem. By demand of employees, they educate our worker with high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
and ability. They
Possible agreement error -- use base form here: "provide".
provides
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
multicultural
and equal opportunity input and advancement which do interest to us. By saying that, they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to solute
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
problem and offer a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
working environment.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
on, their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
give a competitive price which is advantage for users/ buyers. The advantage leads consumption interests which become trends for a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
will be developing, economy increases the value.

Also
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
multicultural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
bring various
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
from most two sources. A
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
of them could popularize their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
advertisements to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
. Employees who
Did you mean "work"? Alternatively, check whether the singular of 'Employees' should be used.
works
together could affect the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
on each other. These opened
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
evenly
widely
spread on diversified education, news, music, movie investment. It advances our spiritual life.

The economic, together with the spiritual
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
, is foundation to most of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
aspects,
especially
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Multicultural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
it.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Little
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
multicultural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
could cheat on laws, they could waste our environment or do something even worse,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
that is
their choice and doing, not featured a trend or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
.
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IELTS essay Topic: In most countries, multicultural companies and their products become more and more important. This trend is seriously damaging our quality of life.

Essay
  American English
6 paragraphs
336 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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