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Today, there is no doubt that crime is on the rise in many parts of the world, especially among young people.

Today, there is no doubt that crime is on the rise in many parts of the world, especially among young people. 7577k
Today, there is no doubt that crime is on the rise in many parts of the world, especially among young people. I do believe that there are many reasons of why people do these actions. In this essay, I am going to offer the causes of crime as well as the effective solutions. To embark with the cause, the main reason why children become criminal is that lack of education at school. A good example of this would be Careless of most of teachers because if student do not go to the school and teachers don’t take a control of it, then they could not get a job. As a result, children commit petty crimes to fulfill their daily needs. The forward way might be to control education system in every single school and create profession-based courses for children. By doing this, even unintelligent students can learn profession which will help them in the future. Moreover, in today’s modern world, internet has become a place where students can spend their time. However, nowadays, the young web criminal takes advantage of this and commits fraud on the internet due to the temptation of easy money. For illustrate, according to the ministry of US, in the last decade, 70 percent of hacker actions were committed by teenagers. In my opinion, to tackle this problem, the local community should provide conversations with parents about behavior of a child. To sum up, it has been observed that children do wrong actions because of the lack of primary learning and the temptation of easy money which can be tackled by the governments and their parents.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Today
, there is no doubt that crime is on the rise in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
parts of the world,
especially
among young
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
. I do believe that there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
reasons of why
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
do these actions. In this essay, I am going to offer the causes of crime
as well
as the effective solutions.

To embark with the cause, the main reason why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
become criminal is that lack of education at school. A
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
example of this would be Careless of
After 'most of', you should use 'the' ("most of the teachers") or simply say "most teachers".
most of teachers
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
if student do not go to the school and teachers don’t take a control of it, then they could not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a job.
As a result
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
commit petty crimes to fulfill their daily needs. The forward way might be to control education system in every single school and create profession-based courses for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
. By doing this, even unintelligent students can learn profession which will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them in the future.

Moreover
, in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
’s modern world, internet has become a place where students can spend their time.
However
, nowadays, the young web criminal takes advantage of this and commits fraud on the internet due to the temptation of easy money. For illustrate, according to the ministry of US, in the last decade, 70 percent of hacker actions
were committed
by
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
. In my opinion, to tackle this problem, the local community should provide conversations with parents about behavior of a child.

To sum up, it has
been observed
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
do
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
actions
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the lack of primary learning and the temptation of easy money which can
be tackled
by the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
and their parents.
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IELTS essay Today, there is no doubt that crime is on the rise in many parts of the world, especially among young people.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
270 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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