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Today, the high sales of consumer goods reflect the power of advertising and not the real needs of the society in which the goods are sold. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Today, the high sales of consumer goods reflect the power of advertising and not the real needs of the society in which the goods are sold. 71wb
Nowadays, the increased in sales of various products are to be blamed by the strength of how they were advertised. Indeed, many customers are being attracted to these goods making them buy impulsively even though they are not necessary at all. I somehow agree with this issue as I believe these endorsements provides a huge impact to people. However, still a decision lies within an individual. To begin with, the media plays an important role in endorsing a certain product. Usually, celebrities who are playing in commercials, commonly attract huge number of people especially those who idolized them. These consumers do believe in the credibility of the celebrity they look up to and as a result they ended up buying a certain product thoughtlessly. To illustrate this, a famous actress boosts sales of a certain beauty product on its target consumers because she was able to instill a perception of the product on young people minds. Most of the time, many companies are utilizing this strategy, in order to generate sales. On the other hand, the high sales cannot be blamed at the advertising alone. Hence, also to buyers themselves. Who usually have a mind of their own, to decide what they must buy or onto which they would be spending their budget. If they have the income to spend on a certain product no one could dictate to them whether it is needed by society or not. The buying habits of an individual solely lies to his own decision making. If a product is really good, customers would go for it even though it is not famous and it is because people can make their own judgement. To whether they would allow themselves to be swayed by commercials or not it is up to them to make a move. To conclude, customers have a power to choose good and quality product for themselves. It is better to leave them buying their own goods, as they know what is best for them. Even advertising thus makes an impact, people in the end still get to decide if they must purchase or not.
Nowadays, the increased in sales of various
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
are to
be blamed
by the strength of how they
were advertised
.
Indeed
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
customers are
being attracted
to these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
goods
making them
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
impulsively
even though
they are not necessary at all. I somehow
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this issue as I believe these endorsements provides a huge impact to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
However
,
still
a decision lies within an individual.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, the media plays an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
role in endorsing a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
certain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
.
Usually
, celebrities who are playing in commercials,
commonly
attract huge number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
especially
those who idolized them. These consumers do believe in the credibility of the celebrity they look up to and
as a result
they ended up buying a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
certain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
thoughtlessly
. To illustrate this, a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
actress boosts sales of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
certain
beauty
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
on its target consumers
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
she was able to instill a perception of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
on young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
minds
. Most of the time,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
are utilizing this strategy, in order to generate sales.

On the other hand
, the high sales cannot
be blamed
at the advertising alone.
Hence
,
also
to buyers themselves. Who
usually
have a mind of their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
, to decide what they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
or onto which they would be spending their budget. If they have the income to spend on a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
certain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
no one could dictate to them whether it
is needed
by society or not. The buying habits of an individual
solely
lies to his
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
decision making
. If a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
is
really
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
, customers would go for it
even though
it is not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
and it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
judgement. To whether they would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
themselves to
be swayed
by commercials or not it is up to them to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
.

To conclude
, customers have a power to choose
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
and quality
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
for themselves. It is better to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leave
them buying their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
goods
, as they know what is best for them. Even advertising
thus
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
an impact,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
still
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
to decide if they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
or not.
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IELTS essay Today, the high sales of consumer goods reflect the power of advertising and not the real needs of the society in which the goods are sold.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
352 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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