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Today more and more tourists are visiting places where conditions are difficult, such as the Sahara desert or the Antarctic? What are the benefits and disadvantages of this?

Today more and more tourists are visiting places where conditions are difficult, such as the Sahara desert or the Antarctic? What are the benefits and disadvantages of this? y2GV
There is a significant spike in number of tourists who are visiting places with harsh weather conditions such as dry lands in the Sahara desert and frozen lands in the Antarctic. This essay will eloborate benefits and possible drawbacks about the choice of visiting such places. To commence with, it can be a good choice for the people who like to experience extreme conditions that exists in aforementioned places. Moreover, there are some visitors who opt to put targets for themselves which are very strenuous to achieve, choosing places like deserts and cold regions can offer perfect location and reason for such people. In addition to that, myriad of people around the world are chasing the trend of learning survival skills. For example, a documentary of National Geographic channel showed that the affrican government have arranged a number of survival camps in the Sahara desert which enchanted mutlitude of tourists from all over the globe. On the other hand, tourists can end up in seriously dangerous conditions if they are visiting these places. Firstly, health risks become major concern. Such as hypothermia, vulnerability to extremely low or high temperatures. Secondly, if the tourists get lost during the journey, there will be very less chances of getting rescued as the places are not so popular and because of that reason the authorities do not have profound rescue plans in place. Furthermore, these trips can be extravagant and need huge amount of money to make it happen. For example, trips to the cold places such as Antarctic is exceptionally high-priced not only because special safety equipments are required to survive in the brutal environment but also experienced tour guide is essential to accompany the tourists. To conclude, even though places with unfavourable environment pose several risks, people are visiting the places because some take it as a accomplishment and believe that one should have such experience once in a lifetime. People should carefully consider possible hazards before considering to visit such places.
There is a significant spike in number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
who are visiting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
with harsh weather conditions such as dry lands in the Sahara desert and frozen lands in the Antarctic. This essay will
Possible spelling mistake found.
eloborate
benefits and possible drawbacks about the choice of visiting such places.

To commence with, it can be a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
choice for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who like to experience extreme conditions that exists in aforementioned
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
.
Moreover
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
visitors who opt to put targets for themselves which are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
strenuous to achieve, choosing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
like deserts and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cold
regions can offer perfect location and reason for such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
In addition
to that, myriad of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
around the world are chasing the trend of learning survival
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
.
For example
, a documentary of National Geographic channel
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
that the
Possible spelling mistake found.
affrican
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
have arranged a number of survival camps in the Sahara desert which enchanted
Possible spelling mistake found.
mutlitude
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
from all over the globe.

On the other hand
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
up in
seriously
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
conditions if they are visiting these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
.
Firstly
, health
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risks
become major concern. Such as hypothermia, vulnerability to
extremely
low or high temperatures.
Secondly
, if the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
lost during the journey, there will be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
Did you mean "fewer"? The noun chances is countable.
less
chances of getting rescued as the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
are not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
popular and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of that reason the authorities do not have profound rescue plans in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
place
.
Furthermore
, these trips can be extravagant and need huge amount of money to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
it happen.
For example
, trips to the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cold
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
such as Antarctic is
exceptionally
high-priced not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
special safety equipments
are required
to survive in the brutal environment
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
experienced tour guide is essential to accompany the tourists.

To conclude
,
even though
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
with
Possible spelling mistake. 'unfavourable' is British English.
unfavourable
environment pose several
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risks
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are visiting the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
take it as
Use "an" instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
a
accomplishment and believe that one should have such experience once in a lifetime.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
should
carefully
consider possible hazards
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
The verb 'considering' is used with the gerund form: "considering visiting".
considering to visit
such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
.
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IELTS essay Today more and more tourists are visiting places where conditions are difficult, such as the Sahara desert or the Antarctic? What are the benefits and disadvantages of this?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
330 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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