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Today more and more tourists are visiting places where conditions are difficult, such as Sahara desert or the Antarctic. What are the benefits and disadvantages for tourists who visit such places? v.5

Today more and more tourists are visiting places where conditions are difficult, such as Sahara desert or the Antarctic. What are the benefits and disadvantages for tourists who visit such places? v. 5
Over the last few decades, connectivity between the various remote parts of the world has significantly improved. Now people can travel to the places which were considered impossible to visit until a few years ago. As a result, the number of people visiting difficult places, such as the Sahara desert, the Antarctic and so on, has increased significantly. Although there are certain benefits for tourists in terms of experiencing once in a lifetime moment, there are few unforeseen disadvantages related to physical and mental health. Firstly, travelling to an extreme place like the Sahara desert or the Antarctic tend to help a person in appreciating the comfortable life he has back home. This is to say, a person who visits a place with extreme weather conditions with no proper food and amenities often starts to understand the value of the favourable conditions of their hometown, which most of the time are taken for granted by them. What is more, they want to experience the adrenaline rush that such expeditions bring on For instance, in a recent interview, some of the tourists travelling to the Antarctic have mentioned that the sole reason for their travel is to feel a sense of accomplishment, which they will get by staying in extremely cold weather of the Antarctic. On the other hand, visiting such extreme places is never easy. What adds more to the difficulty is the unpreparedness of the tourists. Many people underestimate the risk of travelling in difficult conditions and put their life at risk. To illustrate, the number of people lost in an avalanche in the Antarctic this year is at an all-time high. Moreover, there are many effects, such as insomnia, frozen bite and so on, that can happen after the travel to such places. In conclusion, It is true that travelling to places with extreme conditions, gives a sense of achievement to tourists and also it benefits them in appreciating life more. However, such visits can adversely affect their health and can even result in death.
Over the last few decades, connectivity between the various remote parts of the world has
significantly
improved
.
Now
people
can travel to the
places
which
were considered
impossible to visit until a few years ago.
As a result
, the number of
people
visiting difficult
places
, such as the Sahara desert, the
Antarctic
and
so
on, has increased
significantly
. Although there are certain benefits for
tourists
in terms of experiencing once in a lifetime moment, there are few unforeseen disadvantages related to physical and mental health.

Firstly
,
travelling
to an
extreme
place
like the Sahara desert or the
Antarctic
tend to
help
a person in appreciating the comfortable life he has back home. This is to say, a person who visits a
place
with
extreme
weather conditions with no proper food and amenities
often
starts
to understand the value of the
favourable
conditions of their hometown, which most of the time
are taken
for granted by them.
What is more
, they want to experience the adrenaline rush that such expeditions bring on
For instance
, in a recent interview,
some of the
tourists
travelling
to the
Antarctic
have mentioned that the sole reason for their travel is to feel a sense of accomplishment, which they will
get
by staying in
extremely
cold
weather of the Antarctic.

On the other hand
, visiting such
extreme
places
is never easy. What
adds
more to the difficulty is the unpreparedness of the
tourists
.
Many
people
underestimate the
risk
of
travelling
in difficult conditions and put their
life
at
risk
. To illustrate, the number of
people
lost in an avalanche in the
Antarctic
this year is at an all-time high.
Moreover
, there are
many
effects, such as insomnia, frozen bite and
so
on, that can happen after the travel to such places.

In conclusion
, It is true that
travelling
to
places
with
extreme
conditions, gives a sense of achievement to
tourists
and
also
it benefits them in appreciating life more.
However
, such visits can
adversely
affect their health and can even result in death.
8.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Today more and more tourists are visiting places where conditions are difficult, such as Sahara desert or the Antarctic. What are the benefits and disadvantages for tourists who visit such places? v. 5

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
337 words
8.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
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  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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