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Throughout the past decades, the advancement in technology has facilitated access to more groundbreaking scientific methods and rapid development of business activities. On attainment of which,

Throughout the past decades, the advancement in technology has facilitated access to more groundbreaking scientific methods and rapid development of business activities. On attainment of which, EwOdM
Throughout the past decades, the advancement in technology has facilitated access to more groundbreaking scientific methods and the rapid development of business activities. On attainment of this, a substantial amount of knowledge and information has been acquired. When it comes down to sharing such information, there are two opposing views; one in favour of sharing and the other taking issue with it. These two standpoints are to be scrutinised fastidiously. On the one hand, disseminating information is believed to be arguably beneficial due to a few reasons. Firstly, there are a sheer number of students, scientists, businessmen, and etc. around the globe who would definitely benefit from it. For instance, an engineering student could use the information for his/her academic projects or gain a clearer insight into different majors and fields of study. Secondly, it will undoubtedly help various groups of researchers and developers to keep themselves updated and avoid carrying out experiments that will result in the already attained findings. Consequently, the process of exchanging information might hopefully yield better collaboration between the mentioned groups. On the other hand, some might argue that this important information in the hands of wrongdoers may possibly culminate in deleterious effects. For example, if the complete information about the layout of prominent parts of designing a website is freely spread, it could probably teach a person about different ways of hacking. Also, investments have been made, the fiscal fund has been allocated, and specialists have been paid so that the information could be obtained. So, sharing it freely and at no cost would not seem feasible. In conclusion, there are advantages and disadvantages to sharing valuable and priceless information. I personally hold the view that moderate sharing could be an effective solution.
Throughout the past decades, the advancement in technology has facilitated access to more groundbreaking scientific methods and the rapid development of business activities. On attainment of this, a substantial amount of knowledge and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
has
been acquired
. When it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
down to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sharing
such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
, there are two opposing views; one in
Possible spelling mistake. 'favour' is British English.
favour
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sharing
and the other taking issue with it. These two standpoints are to be
Possible spelling mistake. 'scrutinised' is British English.
scrutinised
fastidiously
.

On the one hand, disseminating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
is believed
to be
arguably
beneficial due to a few reasons.
Firstly
, there are a sheer number of students, scientists, businessmen,
Write the name of the item after 'and' or use only "etc".
and etc
. around the globe who would definitely benefit from it.
For instance
, an engineering student could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
for his/her academic projects or gain a clearer insight into
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
majors and fields of study.
Secondly
, it will
undoubtedly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
various groups of researchers and developers to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
themselves updated and avoid carrying out experiments that will result in the already attained findings.
Consequently
, the process of exchanging
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
might
hopefully
yield better collaboration between the mentioned groups.

On the other hand
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
might argue that this
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
in the hands of wrongdoers may
possibly
culminate in deleterious effects.
For example
, if the complete
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
about the layout of prominent parts of designing a website is
freely
spread, it could
probably
teach a person about
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
ways of hacking.
Also
, investments have
been made
, the fiscal fund has
been allocated
, and specialists have
been paid
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
could
be obtained
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sharing
it
freely
and at no cost would not seem feasible.

In conclusion
, there are advantages and disadvantages to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sharing
valuable and priceless
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
. I
personally
hold the view that moderate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sharing
could be an effective solution.
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IELTS essay Throughout the past decades, the advancement in technology has facilitated access to more groundbreaking scientific methods and rapid development of business activities. On attainment of which,

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
289 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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