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These days many people prefer ready to eat food outside of their home rather than homemade food Do you think this has more advantages or disadvantages v.2

These days many people prefer ready to eat food outside of their home rather than homemade food Do you think this has more advantages or disadvantages v. 2
It is true that rather than consuming home cooked food, people tend to have ready made food at restaurants or cafes. However there are both positives and negatives of this development. While eating food outside has advantages such as it saves time and money, I think that frequent consumption of this food leads to health problems. On the one hand, there are several benefits of consumption of ready made food. One is that it saves time of the consumer since most of the fast foods take relatively less time or no time to cook and serve as compared to home cooked food. Secondly, many canned foods are cheaper in price and because of that a person can save a significant amount of money. For example, Tim Hortons, a famous canadian restaurant, provides full meal of one time at the price of 4$ which is much cheaper than the average cost of homemade food. Hence, fast food is not only cheap in terms of money but also saves valuable time of the consumer. On the other hand, there are some major drawbacks of this trend. One is that most of the fast foods are pre-processed and contain food preservatives in order to prolong the lifespan of the food. However, these substances are injurious to the health of the consumer and can lead to problems related to lungs, heart and physical health such as diabetes and obesity. According to a recent conducted at Harvard University in 2018 shown that 70% of the Americans who eat fast food on a regular basis are obese. Hence, frequent consumption of fast food has adverse effects on human’s health and well being. In conclusion, consuming fast food rather than home cooked food has both advantages and disadvantages. While there are benefits such as it saves time and money, I firmly believe that fast food makes youngsters unhealthy and leads to problems such as diabetes and obesity.
It is true that
rather
than consuming home cooked
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
tend to have
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
ready made
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
at restaurants or
'cafes' is an imported foreign expression, which originally has a diacritic. Consider using "cafés"
cafes
.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
However
there are both positives and negatives of this development. While eating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
outside has advantages such as it
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
saves
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that frequent consumption of this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
leads to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
problems.

On the one hand, there are several benefits of consumption of
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
ready made
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
. One is that it
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
saves
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
of the consumer since most of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
take
relatively
less
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
or no
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to cook and serve as compared to home cooked
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
.
Secondly
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
canned
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
are cheaper in price and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of that a person can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
save
a significant amount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
.
For example
, Tim Hortons, a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
Possible spelling mistake found.
canadian
restaurant, provides full meal of one
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
at the price of
The currency mark is usually put at the beginning of the number: "$4".
4$
which is much cheaper than the average cost of homemade
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
.
Hence
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
is not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cheap
in terms of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
saves
valuable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
of the consumer.

On the other hand
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
major drawbacks of this trend. One is that most of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
are
Possible spelling mistake found.
pre-processed
and contain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
preservatives in order to prolong the lifespan of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
.
However
, these substances are injurious to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
of the consumer and can lead to problems related to lungs, heart and physical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
such as diabetes and obesity. According to a recent conducted at Harvard University in 2018 shown that 70% of the Americans who eat
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
on a regular basis are obese.
Hence
, frequent consumption of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
has adverse effects on human’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
and
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
well being
.

In conclusion
, consuming
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
rather
than home cooked
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
has both advantages and disadvantages. While there are benefits such as it
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
saves
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
, I
firmly
believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
youngsters unhealthy and leads to problems such as diabetes and obesity.
12Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
45Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes

IELTS essay These days many people prefer ready to eat food outside of their home rather than homemade food Do you think this has more advantages or disadvantages v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
320 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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