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These days a huge number of women work at home to grow up their children than men and they should stay at home .

These days a huge number of women work at home to grow up their children than men and they should stay at home. o5maK
These days a huge number of women work at home to grow up their children than men and they should stay at home. However, i do not agree with this opinion, in my view women have to partake in outside working like men. In this essay, i am going to discuss this opinion. There is a old belief in many societies says that women just have to do house work but, now days the number of women who work out has increased. Women have an ability to do outsides works even they have children. Firstly, it is not their dust to growing children up what is more, both father And mother have to involve in raising children. Women are creative in different kinds of jobs and we can not limit them to just work at home. Secondly, some women have 2 jobs. For example, they do part - time work and after that they work at home and also try to give their children a good upbringing. Due to this fact women are able to do both jobs and help the father of family in economic problems too. In conclusion, women can handle 2 jobs professionally and working out side can not contribute their house work. In addition they have a important role in many jobs.
These days a huge number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
at home to grow up their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
than
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
men and
they should stay at home.
However
,
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this opinion, in my view
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
partake in outside working like
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
men
.

In this essay,
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
am going to discuss this opinion.

There is
Use "an" instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
belief in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
societies says that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
do
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
days the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
out has increased.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Women
have an ability to do outsides works even they have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
.
Firstly
, it is not their dust to growing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
up
what is more
, both father And mother
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
involve in raising
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Women
are creative in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
kinds of
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
jobs and
we can not limit them to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
at home.
Secondly
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
have 2
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
.
For example
, they do part
Consider using an m-dash if you do not want to join two words.
-
time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
and after that they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
at home and
also
try to give their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
upbringing. Due to this fact
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
are able to do both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
the father of family in economic problems too.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
can handle 2
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
professionally
and working
Did you mean "outside"?
out side
can not contribute their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
. In
The comma is probably missing here: "addition, they".
addition they
have
Use "an" instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
role in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
.
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IELTS essay These days a huge number of women work at home to grow up their children than men and they should stay at home.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
216 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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