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These day when children become adults,it normal their social behaviour

These day when children become adults, it normal their social behaviour wmVxE
These day when children become adults, it normal their social behaviour changes in some ways. Some of children their behaviour change, while others children they don't change their behaviour. This essay discuss both side and will draw my reasons for my answer. In one hand, there are many different types of social behaviour for example some of children they changed they don't like to talk with other people or making new friendships and another of children they prefer to communication with other people or making friendship. So, that why we divided types of behaviour to tow types. One another hands some of children don't change their behaviour for example when they children they didn't like to play with other people, when the become adults they stay the same they don't prefer to play with other people. Also, the change depends in the society they live in because they society they influence on their behaviour allots. For example, when they community it is support the children they influence good for their behaviour but when they don't support them it is influence bad for their behaviour. In conclusion, after a careful analysis of both types, I believe that the common type is they change their behaviour.
Did you mean "this day" or "These days"?
These day
when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
become adults,
It seems that a verb is missing after "it". Please verify.
it
normal their social
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
changes
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
ways.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
their
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
change
, while others
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
don't
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
change
their
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
.
The verb 'discuss' is plural. Did you mean: "This essay discusses"? Did you use a verb instead of a noun?
This essay discuss
both side and will draw my reasons for my answer. In one hand, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
types
of social
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
for example
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
don't
like to talk with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
or making new friendships and another of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
they prefer to communication with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
or making friendship.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, that why we divided
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
types
of
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
to tow
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
types
. One another hands
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
don't
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
change
their
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
for example
when they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
they didn't like to play with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, when the become adults they stay the same they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
don't
prefer to play with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
Also
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
change
depends in the society they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
Do not use a noun immediately after the pronoun 'they'. Use a verb or an adverb, or possibly some other part of speech.
they society
they influence on their
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
allots.
For example
, when they community it is support the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
they influence
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
for their
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
when they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
don't
support them it is influence
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
for their
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
.
In conclusion
, after a careful analysis of both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
types
, I believe that the common
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
type
is they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
change
their
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
.
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IELTS essay These day when children become adults, it normal their social behaviour

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
204 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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