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There is no longer enough natural resources to sustain current levels of economic growth. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? v.1

There is no longer enough natural resources to sustain current levels of economic growth. with this statement? v. 1
It cannot be denied that one of the most important functions of the government is the utilization management, and the best use of its resources. However, some people may argue that the officials have to support the public facilities over musical and drawing activities, I would stand for the belief that Art is as much important. There is no doubt that musical works and drawing are essential in the current time. Although music has been around for centuries, it has gone through many different stages with different styles. As a result, it has played a significant role in building the character of humanity over the different years. For instance, a recent study in the college of Arts in Cairo, Egypt has shown that the old ancient Pharos played different types of singing during their wars to burst the morals of the soldiers. Additionally, in the modern time, people rely a lot on melody in order to relax, and to empower their sense of creativity. For these convincing reasons, I see that the government should spend some money on the arts. On the other hand, because the life is so tough and due to the lack of resources, others may believe that the community and social services are more important. They may believe that providing the financial support to the hospitals and the healthcare facilities can enhance the services by building more hospitals by which the capacity of services will be increased. They have an important point of view which should be taken into consideration while the authorities are making the monetary plans. In conclusion, Despite the fact that a sector of the society may see that the services which affect the people’s daily life is essential, I see that Arts and music are extremely pivotal in enhancing the society creativity and to relief it tension.
It cannot
be denied
that one of the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
functions of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
is the utilization management, and the best
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of its resources.
However
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
may argue that the officials
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
support the public facilities over musical and drawing activities, I would stand for the belief that Art is as much
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
.

There is no doubt that musical works and drawing are essential in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
time. Although music has been around for centuries, it has gone through
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
stages with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
styles.
As a result
, it has played a significant role in building the character of humanity over the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
years.
For instance
, a recent study in the college of Arts in Cairo, Egypt has shown that the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
ancient
Possible spelling mistake found.
Pharos
played
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
types of singing during their wars to burst the morals of the soldiers.
Additionally
, in the modern time,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
rely a lot on melody in order to relax, and to empower their sense of creativity. For these convincing reasons, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
that the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should spend
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
money on the arts.

On the other hand
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
the life is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
tough and due to the lack of resources, others may believe that the community and social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
services
are more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
. They may believe that providing the financial support to the hospitals and the healthcare facilities can enhance the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
services
by building more hospitals by which the capacity of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
services
will
be increased
. They have an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
point of view which should
be taken
into consideration while the authorities are making the monetary plans.

In conclusion
, Despite the fact that a sector of the society may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
services
which affect the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
’s daily life is essential, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
that Arts and music are
extremely
pivotal in enhancing the society creativity and to relief it
Did you mean "tensions"?
tension
.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay There is no longer enough natural resources to sustain current levels of economic growth. with this statement? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
305 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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