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There is little that individuals can do to help the environment. Do you agree? v.1

There is little that individuals can do to help the environment. Do you agree? v. 1
Nowadays, one of the biggest issues is protecting the environment and some people believe that the government and the large firms are the ones who have to do something about that. However, in my opinion, there is more that individuals are capable of doing than they know. To begin with, there is a lot that can be done about pollution. For example, if ordinary people stop using their cars all the time and take the public transport, use their bikes or just walk, this will reduce the air pollution drastically. In addition, this will also make them fitter and they will have a healthier lifestyle. Secondly, individuals are responsible for most of the household waste and if they stop dropping their litter on the streets thinking that this cannot do anything serious and start recycling, the household waste will not be such a problem. Finally, some of the people who are more informed about the causes of the environmental problems can raise awareness about this and when the individuals are well - informed, they will start caring more. In conclusion, although it is true that government and the bigger firms have a big impact on the environment, individuals are also capable of doing a lot.
Nowadays, one of the biggest issues is protecting the environment and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
and the large firms are the ones who
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
do something about that.
However
, in my opinion, there is more that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
are capable of doing than they know.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, there is a lot that can
be done
about pollution.
For example
, if ordinary
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stop
using their cars all the time and take the public transport,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
their bikes or
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
walk, this will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the air pollution
drastically
.
In addition
, this will
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
them
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
fitter and
they will have a healthier lifestyle.

Secondly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
are responsible for most of the household waste and if they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stop
dropping their litter on the streets thinking that this cannot do anything serious and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
recycling, the household waste will not be such a problem.

Finally
,
If the text is a generality, 'of the' is not necessary. Did you mean "some"?
some of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who are more informed about the causes of the environmental problems can raise awareness about this and when the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
are well
Consider using an m-dash if you do not want to join two words.
-
informed, they will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
caring more.

In conclusion
, although it is true that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
and the bigger firms have a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
impact on the environment,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
are
also
capable of doing a lot.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes

IELTS essay There is little that individuals can do to help the environment. Do you agree? v. 1

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
205 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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