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There is an increasing trend around the world of married couples deciding not to have children, Dscuss the advantages and disadvantages for couple who decide to do this. v.1

There is an increasing trend around the world of married couples deciding not to have children, Dscuss the advantages and disadvantages for couple who decide to do this. v. 1
Nowadays it has been observed in the world that married persons have agreed not to have children owing to the physical and financial stress that they might encounter whilst raising a youth, but there are some drawbacks to be taken into account. To begin with, one major benefit for couples who have decided not to give birth is that it relieves them of daily expenses of taking care of an adolescent. This could be due to the fact that, prior to the delivery of a youngster, some maternity items are expected to be bought and also there are some things that theteenager would need whilst growing up and also the inflation of prices has become difficult for parents to support a offspring's education. For example, 70% of private schools charge beyond what some parents can afford thereby subjecting them to take their children to public schools. Furthermore, a newly wedded couple would not want to pass to the rigorous activities considered in raising up a minor. This is because, they might be busy at work so dedicating some time to take care of children would hinder them to achieve work tasks. On the other hand, a major issue for husband and wife refusing to give birth, that is, they are not availed the opportunity to be taken care of by their own blood but by an outsider who might not be sincere with them. This could lead to an abuse by the caregivers and at this point they might not be able to report to the authorities what they are passing through due to old age. Another disadvantage of not having children is that there will not be a juvenile to will their properties to or that can take over their business investment after they are gone. In conclusion, while having a kid is not of interest to couple presently, they should be wary of the issues they encounter at old age.
Nowadays it has
been observed
in the world that married persons have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agreed
not to have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
owing to the physical and financial
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
that they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
might
encounter whilst raising a youth,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
drawbacks to
be taken
into account.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, one major benefit for couples who have decided not to give birth is that it relieves them of daily expenses of taking care of an adolescent. This could be due to the fact that, prior to the delivery of a youngster,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
maternity items are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
expected
to be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bought
and
also
there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
things that
Possible spelling mistake found.
theteenager
would need whilst growing up and
also
the inflation of prices has become difficult for parents to support
Use "an" instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
a
offspring's education.
For example
, 70% of private schools charge beyond what
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
parents can afford thereby subjecting them to take their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to public schools.
Furthermore
, a
newly
wedded couple would not want to pass to the rigorous activities considered in raising up a minor. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
, they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
might
be busy at work
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
dedicating
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
time to take care of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
would hinder them to achieve work tasks.

On the other hand
, a major issue for husband and wife refusing to give birth,
that is
, they are not availed the opportunity to
be taken
care of by their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
blood
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
by an outsider who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
might
not be sincere with them. This could lead to an abuse by the caregivers and at this point they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
might
not be able to report to the authorities what they are passing through due to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
age. Another disadvantage of not having
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
is that there will not be a juvenile to will their properties to or that can take over their business investment after they
are gone
.

In conclusion
, while having a kid is not of interest to couple
presently
, they should be wary of the issues they encounter at
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
age.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS essay There is an increasing trend around the world of married couples deciding not to have children, Dscuss the advantages and disadvantages for couple who decide to do this. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
322 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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