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There is a dilemma about how children should be taught to be good citizens for their society, country. While someone believes that parents play a pivotal role in this situation, others consider that it should be done by teachers at schools. This essay will discuss both points.

There is a dilemma about how children should be taught to be good citizens for their society, country. While someone believes that parents play a pivotal role in this situation, others consider that it should be done by teachers at schools. This essay will 30Rln
There is a dilemma about how children should be taught to be good citizens for their society, country. While someone believes that parents play a pivotal role in this situation, others consider that it should be done by teachers at schools. This essay will discuss both points. On the one hand, Parents are role models for their offspring, since they bring up them. Children are with their families in the left 17 hours. Wherever children go, they reflect their parents' behaviours. Therefore parents should put some codes of conduct for their children. For instance, if parents take their children to clean public places spoilt, this activity will teach children to keep their environment neat. On the other hand, some people suggest that schools should hold some subjects to teach children how they can be kind for their community. The schools should arrange field trips, encourage children to help to charities and so on. For example, if schools request children bring things that they do not use in order to send to pupils in villages, this aid will make children gracious which is the ground rule for being a good member to the public. In my opinion, both viewpoints are true. However, they should balance and be together to raise good children, bright future. To sum up, some people think that parents should enlight their children to be beneficial for their society, while others suggest that schools should be put first place to educate the children. In my point of view, parents and schools should be together to construct good public.
There is a dilemma about how
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
should
be taught
to be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
citizens for their society, country. While someone believes that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
play a pivotal role in this situation, others consider that it should
be done
by teachers at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
. This essay will discuss both points.

On the one hand,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Parents
are role models for their offspring, since they bring up them.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Children
are with their families in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
left
17 hours. Wherever
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
go, they reflect their parents'
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviours' is British English.
behaviours
.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Therefore
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
should put
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
codes of conduct for their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
.
For instance
, if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
take their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to clean public places
Possible spelling mistake. 'spoilt' is British English.
spoilt
, this activity will teach
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
their environment neat.

On the other hand
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
suggest that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
should hold
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
subjects to teach
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
how they can be kind for their community. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
should arrange field trips, encourage
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to charities and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on.
For example
, if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
request
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
bring things that they do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
in order to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
send
to pupils in villages, this aid will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
gracious which is the ground
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rule
for being a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
member to the public.

In my opinion, both viewpoints are true.
However
, they should balance and be together to raise
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
, bright future.

To sum up,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
should
Possible spelling mistake found.
enlight
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to be beneficial for their society, while others suggest that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
should
be put
first
place to educate the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
. In my point of view,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
should be together to construct
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
public.
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IELTS essay There is a dilemma about how children should be taught to be good citizens for their society, country. While someone believes that parents play a pivotal role in this situation, others consider that it should be done by teachers at schools. This essay will

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
260 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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