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The world is consuming natural resources faster than they can be renewed. Therefore, it is important that products are made to last. Governments should discourage people from constantly buying up-to-date or fashionable products. v.1

The world is consuming natural resources faster than they can be renewed. Therefore, it is important that products are made to last. Governments should discourage people from constantly buying up-to-date or fashionable products. v. 1
In today’s world exploitation and exploration of natural resources, at its peak for the sake of personal benefit.   This is an alarming situation and there is dire need of taking precautionary measures. Despite this, I do not agree to some extent to limit the use of modern products and encourage companies to make long lasting products. By doing so, we are compromising safety issues and depriving people to take benefits from the modern and advanced technology. There is no doubt that modern products are designed in accordance with latest technology and safety measures. For instance, today’s cars are much better in performance and more secure than older cars, as a new car has the state of the art features such as the airbag, camera and the internet connectivity etc. Those functions make cars more reliable and durable and comfortable for its users. Additionally, being a part of the modern and diverse world, one should be equipped with modern products to create ease and comfort in their life. Durable and long lasting products will create discrimination among people, as such products require huge amount for its development and would not be in reach of poor people. Moreover, this will have negative impacts on new and inexperienced companies to develop kind of products that demand enormous funds and time. Thus, it will cause unemployment as not too many businesses would able to bear huge expenses. Frequently changing the car or other luxury items by rich is a negative tendency and the government take steps to aware them, but it would not be successful to a large extent. The government ultimately won’t be able to prevent rich people from doing so. In this regards, other alternatives like recycling products whenever possible, imposing more tax on luxury items etc. could be more effective. To sum up, I would like to say that government should come up with pragmatic approaches to devising an alternative to natural resources than confiding people not to use latest and modern products.
In
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
’s world exploitation and exploration of natural resources, at its peak for the sake of personal benefit.
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
This is an alarming situation and there is dire need of taking precautionary measures. Despite this, I do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
extent to limit the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
modern
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
and encourage
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
long lasting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
. By doing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
, we are compromising safety issues and depriving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to take benefits from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
modern
and advanced technology.

There is no doubt that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
modern
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
are designed
in accordance with
A determiner is probably missing here: "the latest".
latest
technology and safety measures.
For instance
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
are much better in performance and more secure than older
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
, as a new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
has the
Did you mean "state-of-the-art"?
state of the art
features such as the airbag, camera and the internet connectivity etc. Those functions
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
more reliable and durable and comfortable for its users.
Additionally
, being a part of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
modern
and diverse world, one should
be equipped
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
modern
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
to create
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ease
and comfort in their life.

Durable and
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
long lasting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
will create discrimination among
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, as such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
require huge amount for its development and would not be in reach of poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
Moreover
, this will have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
impacts on new and inexperienced
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
to develop kind of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
that demand enormous funds and time.
Thus
, it will cause unemployment as not too
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
businesses
Did you mean "would be able"?
would able
to bear huge expenses.

Frequently
changing the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
or other luxury items by rich is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
tendency and the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
take steps to aware them,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it would not be successful to a large extent. The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
ultimately
won’t be able to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
rich
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
from doing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
. In
Did you mean "these"?
this
regards, other alternatives like recycling
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
whenever possible, imposing more tax on luxury items etc. could be more effective.

To sum up, I would like to say that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
up with pragmatic approaches to devising an alternative to natural resources than confiding
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
not to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
latest and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
modern
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
.
4Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
25Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay The world is consuming natural resources faster than they can be renewed. Therefore, it is important that products are made to last. Governments should discourage people from constantly buying up-to-date or fashionable products. v. 1

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
333 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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