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The unlimited use of cars may cause many problems. What are those problems? In order to reduce the problem, should we discourage people to use cars?

The unlimited use of cars may cause many problems. What are those problems? In order to reduce the problem, should we discourage people to use cars? DAJ6
During this carbon-conscious era, the rapid rise of cars is concerned to result in a range of worrying impacts on social life. Although there will undoubtedly be some negative consequences of this trend, solutions can be taken to mitigate these potential problems. On the one hand, extensive car use has been bringing about serious complications for the environment and social life. Emission from cars is one of the key contributors to environmental issues such as air contamination, noise pollution. . . These extreme climatic conditions disturb our daily activities. Long-term exposure to air pollution has been associated with a wide range of human health effects including increased respiratory symptoms, hospitalization for heart or lung diseases, and even premature death. Moreover, rising traffic congestion is an inescapable condition in large due to growing personal vehicles. Nowadays, people tend to drive to work rather than walk, cycle or take public transport, which leads to heavy traffic jams almost every day at rush hour. This problem has caused not only negative emotions such as impatience, anger. . . but also work delay and late arrivals. There are several actions that could be taken to solve the problems mentioned above. Firstly, it is important for the government to impose taxes on car production and import. This may raise car prices and discourage potential customers. These tax payments can be used to improve public transport to attract the attention of commuters; reduce the demand of private transport. What is more, car manufacturers should design more environmentally friendly cars, which run on alternative energy such as solar power or hydrogen or renewable sources to replace fossil fuels. This would discharge little carbon dioxide into the atmosphere. Finally, campaigns and educational programs should be launched on all media platforms with a view to promoting public awareness about the environmental hazards of car travelling. In conclusion, private cars do have multiple adverse impacts on both social development and environmental well-being. From my perspective, it is imperative to reduce car ownership for the sake of protecting a sustainable environment.
During this carbon-conscious era, the rapid rise of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
is concerned
to result in a range of worrying impacts on social life. Although there will
undoubtedly
be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
consequences of this trend, solutions can
be taken
to mitigate these potential problems.

On the one hand, extensive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
has been bringing about serious complications for the environment and social life. Emission from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
is one of the key contributors to environmental issues such as air contamination, noise pollution.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
These extreme climatic conditions disturb our daily activities. Long-term exposure to air pollution has
been associated
with a wide range of human health effects including increased respiratory symptoms, hospitalization for heart or lung diseases, and even premature death.
Moreover
, rising traffic congestion is an inescapable condition in large due to growing personal vehicles. Nowadays,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
tend to drive to work
rather
than walk, cycle or take public transport, which leads to heavy traffic jams almost every day at rush hour. This problem has caused not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
emotions such as impatience, anger.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
but
also
work delay and late arrivals.

There are several actions that could
be taken
to solve the problems mentioned above.
Firstly
, it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
for the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
to impose taxes on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
production and import. This may raise
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
prices and discourage potential customers. These tax payments can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
public transport to attract the attention of commuters;
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the demand of private transport.
What is more
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
manufacturers should design more
environmentally
friendly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
, which run on alternative energy such as solar power or hydrogen or renewable sources to replace fossil fuels. This would discharge
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
carbon dioxide into the atmosphere.
Finally
, campaigns and educational programs should
be launched
on all media platforms with a view to promoting public awareness about the environmental hazards of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
travelling.

In conclusion
, private
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
do have multiple adverse impacts on both social development and environmental well-being. From my perspective, it is imperative to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
ownership for the sake of protecting a sustainable environment.

IELTS essay The unlimited use of cars may cause many problems. What are those problems? In order to reduce the problem, should we discourage people to use cars?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
340 words
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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