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The tendency of media to focus on negative and emergencies instead of positive news has negative impact to society

The tendency of media to focus on negative and emergencies instead of positive news has negative impact to society 9pbr
It is important for news outlet to be able to provide information in a timely and clear manner. However, most companies tend to centralize their message on issues and emergencies instead of positive news. This way of reporting might lead to negative impact to the people that watch it. Personally, I agree with this statement and I will explain my reasoning in the following paragraphs. Firstly, people will become easily paranoid. When average citizens are being fed with constant stream of bad news, this might change their way of thinking which could lead to people easily feeling panic upon hearing certain news. For instance, when the coronavirus were only in China the media outlets did not report about this daily. However, when the virus already entered Australia, the media kept on reporting on it everyday, even if there was nothing new to be reported. The way the media crafted the news reporting could cause panic in the society, since it was kept on being reported. As a consequence, this led to panic buying in Australia, where people were purchasing grocery excessively and it caused shortage nationwide. Due to the media's focus on problems, this led people feeling panic. Secondly, the anxiousness could cause the economy to suffer. In the previous paragraph, I already highlighted how people could become paranoid due to the news. This shows that society's feeling can be influenced quickly by the media. If the media, for instance, gives information constantly about random stabbing or crimes in a certain area, this could cause people to not wanting to visit the cafes or restaurants or small business around that area. The decrease of customer visits could cause the businesses to go bankrupt which in turn make the economy suffer. The income of the local businesses is lost due to news that focuses on emergencies. In conclusion, the media hold a significant power and they could affect the perception of the society easily. If they are being served with news which centralizes its message on problems and emergencies, this might cause panic and anxiety which might also negatively impact the economy.
It is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
outlet to be able to provide information in a timely and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
manner.
However
, most
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
tend to centralize their message on issues and emergencies
instead
of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
. This way of reporting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
might
lead to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
impact to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
it.
Personally
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this statement and I will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
my reasoning in the following paragraphs.

Firstly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will become
easily
paranoid. When average citizens are
being fed
with constant stream of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
, this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
might
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
their way of thinking which could lead to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
easily
feeling
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
panic
upon hearing certain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
.
For instance
, when the coronavirus were
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
in China the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
outlets did not report about this daily.
However
, when the virus already entered Australia, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
kept
on reporting on it
'Everyday' is an adjective. Did you mean "every day"?
everyday
, even if there was nothing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
to
be reported
. The way the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
crafted the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
reporting could
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cause
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
panic
in the society, since it was
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
kept
on
being reported
. As a consequence, this led to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
panic
buying in Australia, where
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
were purchasing grocery
excessively
and it caused shortage nationwide. Due to the media's focus on problems, this led
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
feeling panic.

Secondly
, the anxiousness could
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cause
the economy to suffer. In the previous paragraph, I already highlighted how
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
could become paranoid due to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
. This
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
that society's feeling can
be influenced
quickly
by the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
. If the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
,
for instance
, gives information
constantly
about random stabbing or crimes in a certain area, this could
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cause
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to not wanting to visit the
'cafes' is an imported foreign expression, which originally has a diacritic. Consider using "cafés"
cafes
or restaurants or
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
business around that area. The decrease of customer visits could
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cause
the businesses to go bankrupt which in turn
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
the economy suffer. The income of the local businesses
is lost
due to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
that focuses on emergencies.

In conclusion
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
hold a significant
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
power and
they could affect the perception of the society
easily
. If they are
being served
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
which centralizes its message on problems and emergencies, this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
might
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cause
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
panic
and anxiety which
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
might
also
negatively
impact the economy.
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IELTS essay The tendency of media to focus on negative and emergencies instead of positive news has negative impact to society

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
351 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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