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The table below shows the world’s ten most expensive countries for petrol along with other financial information. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. v.1

The table below shows the world’s ten most expensive countries for petrol along with other financial information.
It is common among individuals of society to mimic each other in terms of fashion of clothes and also on the basis of purchasing goods. I also agree with the given statement and shall discuss some valid points for my opinion. Firstly, the enhancement in persons' out looking cannot be overlooked. To simplify, as we know everyone wants to look beautiful and handsome, so for this purpose a person get motivated from one's role models such as, singers actors and many more. Once their model started wearing different types of clothes, then their supporters and fans also wear same stocks. Therefore, this phenomenon leads to the popularity of fashions in clothes. Secondly, some affluent are highly educated and they are in favour of today's sophisticated era. In other words, they want to purchase some renowned brands of domestic products and vehicles. For example, the person who is little bit educated, he/she wants to own famous brands of car like Ford Jaguar and many more rather than other local brands. So, only due to this practice some unqualified sections of the society also opt for these popular brands which, ultimately, gives birth to mimicry. Contrarily, it is also true that although people get updated from other people regarding new brands, they spend according to their budget because there are a lot of expenses on a house. And it can be seen that the publicity of fashions in clothes and that of other consumer goods has become possible due to a majority of advertisements regardless of copying one another. After taking the aforementioned information into consideration, it can be concluded that role model and educated people act as arrows of popularity of clothing fashions and other consumer goods.
It is common among individuals of society to mimic each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
in terms of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fashion
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
clothes
and
also
on the basis of purchasing
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
. I
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
statement and shall discuss
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
valid points for my opinion.

Firstly
, the enhancement in persons' out looking cannot
be overlooked
. To simplify, as we know everyone wants to look
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
beautiful
and handsome,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
for this purpose a person
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
motivated from one's role models such as, singers actors and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
more. Once their model
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
wearing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
types of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
clothes
, then their supporters and fans
also
wear same stocks.
Therefore
, this phenomenon leads to the popularity of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fashions
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
clothes
.
Secondly
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
Did you mean "(affluent)"?
affluent
are
highly
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
educated and
they are in
Possible spelling mistake. 'favour' is British English.
favour
of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
's sophisticated era. In
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
words, they want to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
renowned
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
brands
of domestic products and vehicles.
For example
, the person who is
Reduce redundancy by using "little" or "bit".
little bit
educated, he/she wants to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
brands
of car like Ford Jaguar and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
more
rather
than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
brands
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
due to this practice
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
unqualified sections of the society
also
opt for these popular
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
brands
which,
ultimately
, gives birth to mimicry.

Contrarily
, it is
also
true that although
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
updated from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
regarding new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
brands
, they spend according to their budget
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
expenses on a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
. And it can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that the publicity of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fashions
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
clothes
and that of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
consumer
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
has become possible due to a majority of advertisements regardless of copying one another.

After taking the aforementioned information into consideration, it can
be concluded
that role model and educated
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
act as arrows of popularity of clothing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fashions
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
consumer
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes
If you talk to a man in a language he understands, that goes to his head. If you talk to him in his own language, that goes to his heart.
Nelson Mandela

IELTS essay The table below shows the world’s ten most expensive countries for petrol along with other financial information.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
286 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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