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The spread of multinational companies and globalization produce positive effects for everyone. To what extant do you agree or disagree?

The spread of multinational companies and globalization produce positive effects for everyone. To what extant WdQN
Nowadays, the world become wider through globalization. Many large companies around the worlds upgrade their companies to be multinational companies. This trend brings a lot of benefits especially for developing countries. I totally agree that the spread of multinational companies and globalization is a good development as it generates lots of advantages that can support and improve the quality of life of international citizens. To begin with, some people argue that globalization is not positive because it creates lots of crimes and frauds, which are very prejudice for people in general. However, this viewpoint can be rejected by seeing a whole meaning of globalization. By globalization, people around the world can make a wider range of networks. Through the improvement of technology in terms of communication, global citizens allow to exchange important information related to job opportunity, educational system, food, and cultures. Also, by globalization, people are allowed to improve their knowledge and skills in terms of communication with other languages. As a result of globalization, many companies in developed countries around the world has upgraded their companies to be multinational companies and spread them out around the world. Multinational companies that are opened in developing countries can help them improving their economic condition. In addition, multinational companies can open up countless job vacancies to the workers or fresh-graduates of those particular country. This type of company usually give the better opportunity, job security and clear career path to their employees For example, some of my friends who worked in Unilever, which is one of the famous multinational company in Indonesia, has become the assistant manager after 3 years working. Also, they will become the junior manager in the next 2 years. Hence, this type of company can offer a good and clear career path to their employees. To conclude, the spread of multinational companies and globalization is a good development because it can brings lots of benefits in terms of job opportunities, exchanging important information, and improving knowledge, skills and abilities in order to understand other languages and cultures.
Nowadays, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
become wider through globalization.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
large
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
around
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
worlds
upgrade their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
to be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
multinational
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
. This trend brings a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lot
of benefits
especially
for developing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
. I
totally
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that the spread of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
multinational
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
and globalization is a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
development as it generates
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lots
of advantages that can support and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
the quality of life of international citizens.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
argue that globalization is not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it creates
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lots
of crimes and frauds, which are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
prejudice for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in general
.
However
, this viewpoint can
be rejected
by seeing a whole meaning of globalization. By globalization,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
around
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a wider range of networks. Through the improvement of technology in terms of communication, global citizens
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
Did you mean "exchanging"? Or maybe you should add a pronoun? In active voice, 'allow' + 'to' takes an object, usually a pronoun.
to exchange
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
information related to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
opportunity, educational system, food, and cultures.
Also
, by globalization,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
allowed
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
their knowledge and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
in terms of communication with other languages.

As a result
of globalization,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
in developed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
around
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
has upgraded their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
to be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
multinational
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
and spread them out
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
around
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Multinational
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
that
are opened
in developing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them
The verb 'developing' is used with an infinitive: "to improve" or "improve".
improving
their economic condition.
In addition
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
multinational
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
can open up countless
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
vacancies to the workers or fresh-graduates of those particular
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
. This type of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
usually
give the better opportunity,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
security and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
career path to their employees
For example
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
of my friends who worked in Unilever, which is one of the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
multinational
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
in Indonesia, has become the assistant manager after 3 years working.
Also
, they will become the junior manager in the
next
2 years.
Hence
, this type of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
can offer a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
career path to their employees.

To conclude
, the spread of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
multinational
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
and globalization is a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
development
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it can
The verb 'can' requires the base form of the verb: "bring"
brings
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lots
of benefits in terms of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
opportunities, exchanging
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
information, and improving knowledge,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
and abilities in order to understand other languages and cultures.
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IELTS essay The spread of multinational companies and globalization produce positive effects for everyone. To what extant

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
340 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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