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The Role of Technology in our life

The Role of Technology in our life LLJ6n
The technological advancements in the past decade has made a huge impact in people’s lives making day-to-day activities flexible and easier but, even though there are so many pros because of the growth in technology it has so many cons too. privacy concerns and insecurity, health issues social behaviours and relationship problems are a few to name as negative aspects and one of the most dangerous aspect is that many people have exposed the personal information in to social networks an online banking websites which can be misused for personal benefits and the probability of falling into wrong relationship leading to making wrong networks with the wrong people is high, moreover your assets, wealth could be at risk as there are many ways for hackers to steal your personal banking details networks and more. On the contrary online banking and social networks can be the best way of handling your daily needs for an example online banking can save tons of time in your busy life making transactions and the cashflow with a tap of your finger and social networks breaks the barrier of connecting people of different parts of the world of different cultures henceforth we could make new networks for various social services and it also solves the problem of unemployment because platforms like LinkedIn brings job opportunities to your fingertips. So to conclude, benefits of social networks and online banking out runs the bad outcomes and further as the official banking websites and online social platforms are secured of the risks of uploading our personal information Into websites. In my point of view I would prefer to put my personal information to online banking and social networks and it is up to each and every individual to be cautious and alert when providing your personal details online
The technological advancements in the past decade has made a huge impact in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people’s
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
making day-to-day activities flexible and easier
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
,
even though
there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
pros
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the growth in technology it has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
cons too.

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
privacy
concerns and insecurity, health issues
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviours' is British English.
behaviours
and relationship problems are a few to name as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
aspects and one of the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
Please check whether a plural form of 'aspect' should be used.
aspect
is that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have exposed the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
personal
information in to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
networks
an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
banking
websites which can
be misused
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
personal
benefits and the probability of falling into
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
relationship leading to making
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
networks
with the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
is
high,
moreover
your assets, wealth could be at
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risk
as there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
ways for hackers to steal your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
personal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
banking
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
details
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
networks
and more.

On the contrary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
banking
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
networks
can be the best way of handling your daily needs for an example
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
banking
can save tons of time in your busy life making transactions and the
Possible spelling mistake found.
cashflow
with a tap of your finger and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
networks
breaks the barrier of connecting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
parts of the world of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
cultures henceforth we could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
networks
for various
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
services and it
also
solves the problem of unemployment
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
platforms like LinkedIn brings job opportunities to your fingertips.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
to conclude
, benefits of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
networks
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
banking
out runs the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
outcomes and
further
as the official
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
banking
websites and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
platforms
are secured
of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risks
of uploading our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
personal
information Into websites. In my point of view I would prefer to put my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
personal
information to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
banking
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
networks
and it is up to each and every individual to be cautious and alert when providing your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
personal
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
details
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
online
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IELTS essay The Role of Technology in our life

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
299 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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