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The role of physically education in school system

The role of physically education in school system Nmaaj
The role of sport is an undeniable fact in everyone’s life and there are many benefits of sport. Physically education is involving to school system in recently years. There are various of sport games in every education institution and physically exercising brings some advantages to humans' life like mentally, academically, socially development. Firstly, there are more responsibilities for children like they have to study well and be successful their lessons. Being physically education in school gives them relax, unstressful and enjoyable time and children avoid from lessons for a while. Physically exercise is good for health and fight against plenty of diseases like obesity, heart attack, psychology matters and so on. People especially, adolescents avoid from bad habits and learn to become focused, determined and control their strengths and weaknesses. Moreover, some of them do not want to study and become a business man in the future. Because of exercising with various species of sport games gives them chance of choice and they can decide vital decisions about their future. Secondly, I believe if there are sport lessons in schools, it must be taken whole day in once or twice a week and children ought to select any sport games that they want to do. It must be created suitable conditions for kids and adolescents. There should be a good fitness center and a wide sport area in every education institution. Everyone should be involved to physically education by teachers in school. Overall, because of benefits of physically exercising people ought to go in for sports in their modern life. The role of physically education in school system is important and advantageous. People should take care of themselves and their children.
The role of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
is an undeniable fact in everyone’s life and there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
benefits of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Physically
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
The verb 'involving' is a stative verb and sometimes the progressive form is not correct. Try a simple form instead.
is involving
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
system in recently years. There are various of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
games in every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
institution and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physically
exercising brings
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
advantages to humans' life like mentally,
academically
,
socially
development.

Firstly
, there are more responsibilities for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
like they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
study well and be successful their lessons. Being
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physically
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
gives them relax,
Possible spelling mistake found.
unstressful
and enjoyable time and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
avoid from lessons for a while.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Physically
exercise is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
for health and fight against
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
plenty
of diseases like obesity, heart attack, psychology matters and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
especially
, adolescents avoid from
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
habits and learn to become focused, determined and control their strengths and weaknesses.
Moreover
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
of them do not want to study and become a business
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
man
in the future.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
of exercising with various species of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
games gives them chance of
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
choice and
they can decide vital decisions about their future.

Secondly
, I believe if there are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
lessons in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
, it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be taken
whole day in once or twice a week and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
ought to select any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
games that they want to do. It
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be created
suitable conditions for kids and adolescents. There should be a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
fitness center and a wide
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
area in every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
institution. Everyone should
be involved
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physically
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
by teachers in school.

Overall
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of benefits of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physically
exercising
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
ought to go in for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
in their modern life. The role of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physically
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
system is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
and advantageous.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
should take care of themselves and their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
.
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IELTS essay The role of physically education in school system

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
281 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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