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The rising levels of congestion and air pollution found in most of the world cities can be attributed directly to the rapidly increasing number of private cars in use. In order to reverse this decline in the quality of life in cities, attempts must be mad v.2

The rising levels of congestion and air pollution found in most of the world cities can be attributed directly to the rapidly increasing number of private cars in use. In order to reverse this decline in the quality of life in cities, attempts must be mad v. 2
People have different views about whether some people believe that cities have a higher living standard, while other people think that living rural regions are better. In my opinion, I agree the first statement that living in cities are more convenience. On the one hand, the city life brings a lot of benefit due to many reasons. Firstly, living in cities helps people to look for better opportunities to improve in career. To illustrate, almost young people tend to live and work in urban after graduation because cities is economic growth centre. Secondly, the cities are an ideal place for shopping. Obviously, the large brand stores to smaller have opened in cities; therefore, people can purchase anything that they want easily. On the other hand, rural living has also some advantages because of several causes. To begin with, living in the rural area is beneficial for health as it is not affected by a vast of waste gases that come out from means of transport. For instance, there is a tendency for people to use bike cycles in village sections; thus, the environment in this place is less pollution. The next one, living in the countryside is pretty peacefulness; consequently, it is suitable to people can relax and enjoy after period busy working. In conclusion, many people agree that living in the cities are better because having a great deal of chance to develop careers, and convenience to purchase; while, other people like to live in villages due to clearer air and having space to rest.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
views about whether
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
have a higher
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
standard, while other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
rural regions are better. In my opinion, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
the
first
statement that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
are more convenience.

On the one hand, the city life brings
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
benefit due to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
reasons.
Firstly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to look for better opportunities to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
in career. To illustrate, almost young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
tend to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
and work in urban after graduation
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
is economic growth
Possible spelling mistake. 'centre' is British English.
centre
.
Secondly
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
are an ideal place for shopping.
Obviously
, the large brand stores to smaller have opened in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
;
therefore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
anything that they want
easily
.

On the other hand
, rural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
has
also
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
advantages
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of several causes. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in the rural area is beneficial for health as it is not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
by a vast of waste gases that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
out from means of transport.
For instance
, there is a tendency for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
bike cycles in village sections;
thus
, the environment in this place is less pollution. The
next
one,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in the countryside is pretty peacefulness;
consequently
, it is suitable to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can relax and enjoy after period busy working.

In conclusion
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
are better
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
having a great deal of chance to develop careers, and convenience to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
; while, other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
like to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in villages due to clearer air and having space to rest.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay The rising levels of congestion and air pollution found in most of the world cities can be attributed directly to the rapidly increasing number of private cars in use. In order to reverse this decline in the quality of life in cities, attempts must be mad v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
256 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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