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The rise of TikTok and other social media platforms provide a favorable environment for digital artists and content creators. Some people believe there is harmful and potentially dangerous content on them, which may lead to undesirable accidents if followed. Do you think there should be a law limiting the accessibility of these platforms, or such a law would be a severe violation of freedom of speech and human rights?

The rise of TikTok and other social media platforms provide a favorable environment for digital artists and content creators. Some people believe there is harmful and potentially dangerous content on them, which may lead to undesirable accidents if followed. Do you think there should be a law limiting the accessibility of these platforms, or such a law would be a severe violation of freedom of speech and human rights? 8LMnP
It is undeniable that the covid-19 pandemic has affected negatively on many aspects of life, regardless of ages. However, stucking in Covid-19 does not seem to be that bad when people tend to idle away the hour by scrolling down instagram or facebook posts, and of course Tiktok videos from amazing content creators all around the world. The question is, does it always be “positive and healthy”? as some skeptical about Tiktok and other social media platforms are likely to become a two-sword knife, saying that following hazard contents may lead to detrimental and unforeseenable consequences. I’m Huong and today we’re going to discuss about whether this concerning issue should be regulated by law in order to prevent the approachability or not? Let’s find out. First of all, we’re all know what social media is and how it thrives significantly these days. For example, according to IPG Media Lab, the short video app which created by Chinese software company ByteDance; Tiktok, has been downloaded over 1 billion times globally, stayed on top of the “most downloaded iOS app” chart for five consecutive quarters in 2019. So what brings people to become so obsessed with Tiktok? The answer is “Tiktok satisfies our insatiable need for social capital and interstitial media and provides the meaningful connections that social media promises to offer”. It demonstrates clearly that the Maslow hierarchy of need, everybody desires the most if “self-actualization- achieving one’s full potential, including creative activities”. Even if you're more of a lurker than a creator, keeping up with pop culture and being the first in your social network to find and share intriguing stuff can help you build social capital. “Too much of a good thing is harmful”. Apart from all benefits that make the lives of billions of people less dull, the dark, toxic side will always come along. It does not come as a surprise that dangerous challenge or content which is considered as offensive and uncanny receive many criticism or worse, are likely to be lethal. For example, a 9-year-old boy named La Terius Smith Jr. passed away on June, 2021 in Memphis, Tennessee by committing suicide in his bedroom with a belt around his neck. His family discovered that he was trying to do a challenge called “Blackout Challenge”, which encourage users to try and pass out by restricting airflow, claiming it creates a high afterwards. Nevertheless, his death is not the first case of harmful effect caused by Tiktok either, according to CNN there was 2 accidents related to the “electronic socket and penny challenge” in Massachusetts. One causing fire at Westford Academy and forcing it to evacuate all students and teachers. In Vietnam, a male Tiktoker in Sapa died while recording his challenge video on a rooftop. It is reported that this unfortunate man stepped on a hole of a metal roofing and fell on the ground approximately at a height of 10 meters. What a shame that in order to get online famous with millions of views, people tend to risk it all. Sadly, the people i’m talking here is children and adolesence - who does not have full-awareness and concious of what they do and how their corollaries can affect others. How to prevent undesirable accidents from happening again? Well, Tiktok and other social medias have measure for any negative behavior in their ecosystem by using algorithms and artificial intelligence to detect whether one video violates the public principle or not. In addition, users can be a great assistants by allowing them to report unhealthy contents with just a tap. This is what call “survival of the fittest”. Government and authorities do not stand aside in this controversial matter. The US government believes that Tiktok should be controlled because it can leak their citizen’s personal data and threaten national security - the same reason why India banned Tiktok a year ago. However, in my opinion there should be a law to restrict not only the accessibility of these platforms or creators which may lead to from privacy problem to toxic and distorted videos, but also conformity with basic human rights and the freedom of speech. To sum up, i think that a law is essential to create a friendly and better social media platforms as long as there is goodwill among parties.
It is undeniable that the
covid-19
pandemic has
affected
negatively
on
many
aspects of life, regardless of ages.
However
,
stucking
in Covid-19
does
not seem to be that
bad
when
people
tend to idle away the hour by scrolling down
instagram
or
facebook
posts, and
of course
Tiktok
videos
from amazing
content
creators all around the world. The question is,
does
it
always be
positive
and healthy”?
as
some
skeptical about
Tiktok
and other
social
media
platforms are likely to become a two-sword knife, saying that following hazard contents may lead to detrimental and
unforeseenable
consequences. I’m
Huong
and
today
we’re going to
discuss about whether
this concerning issue should
be regulated
by law in order to
prevent
the
approachability
or not?
Let
’s find out.

First of all
, we’re all know what
social
media
is and how it thrives
significantly
these days.
For example
, according to IPG
Media
Lab, the short
video
app which created by Chinese software
company
ByteDance;
Tiktok
, has
been downloaded
over 1 billion times globally, stayed on top of the “most downloaded iOS app” chart for five consecutive quarters in 2019.
So
what brings
people
to become
so
obsessed with
Tiktok
? The answer is “
Tiktok
satisfies our insatiable need for
social
capital and interstitial
media
and provides the meaningful connections that
social
media
promises to offer”. It demonstrates
clearly
that the Maslow hierarchy of need, everybody desires the most if “self-actualization- achieving one’s full potential, including creative activities”. Even if you're more of a lurker than a creator, keeping up with pop culture and being the
first
in your
social
network to find and share intriguing stuff can
help
you build
social
capital.

“Too much of a
good
thing is harmful”. Apart from all benefits that
make
the
lives
of billions of
people
less dull, the dark, toxic side will always
come
along. It
does
not
come
as a surprise that
dangerous
challenge
or
content
which
is considered
as offensive and uncanny receive
many criticism
or worse, are likely to be lethal.
For example
, a 9-year-
old
boy named La
Terius
Smith Jr. passed away on
June, 2021
in Memphis, Tennessee by committing suicide in his bedroom with a belt around his neck. His family discovered that he was trying to do a
challenge
called “Blackout
Challenge”
, which encourage users to
try and
pass out by restricting airflow, claiming it creates a high afterwards.
Nevertheless
, his death is not the
first
case of harmful effect caused by
Tiktok
either, according to CNN
there was 2 accidents
related to the “electronic socket and penny
challenge”
in Massachusetts. One causing fire at
Westford
Academy and forcing it to evacuate all students and teachers. In Vietnam, a male
Tiktoker
in
Sapa
died
while recording his
challenge
video
on a rooftop. It
is reported
that this unfortunate
man
stepped on a hole of a metal roofing and fell on the ground approximately at a height of 10 meters. What a shame that in order to
get
online
famous
with millions of views,
people
tend to
risk
it all.
Sadly
, the
people
i’m
talking here is children and
adolesence
-
who
does
not have full-awareness and
concious
of what they do and how their corollaries can affect others.

How to
prevent
undesirable accidents from happening again? Well,
Tiktok
and other
social
medias
have measure for any
negative
behavior in their ecosystem by using algorithms and artificial intelligence to detect whether one
video
violates the public principle or not.
In addition
, users can be a great assistants by allowing them to report unhealthy contents with
just
a tap. This is what call “survival of the fittest”.

Government
and authorities do not stand aside in this controversial matter. The US
government
believes that
Tiktok
should
be controlled
because
it can leak their citizen’s personal data and threaten national security
-
the same reason why India banned
Tiktok
a year ago.
However
, in my opinion there should be a law to restrict not
only
the accessibility of these platforms or creators which may lead to from privacy problem to toxic and distorted
videos
,
but
also
conformity with basic human rights and the freedom of speech.

To sum up,
i
think
that a law is essential to create a friendly and better
social
media
platforms as long as there is goodwill among parties.
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IELTS essay The rise of TikTok and other social media platforms provide a favorable environment for digital artists and content creators. Some people believe there is harmful and potentially dangerous content on them, which may lead to undesirable accidents if followed. Do you think there should be a law limiting the accessibility of these platforms, or such a law would be a severe violation of freedom of speech and human rights?

Essay
  American English
6 paragraphs
717 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
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