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The responsibility of bringing up children should be shared equally between mother and father. To what extent do you agree or disagree? v.7

The responsibility of bringing up children should be shared equally between mother and father. v. 7
First school for a new born is home and parents are the teachers. Both mother and father are equally responsible for the upbringing of a child and making him/her the best citizen. In 21st century, where mother and father both are working generally does not get enough amount of time to spend with their kids. The environment that parents create at home impacts child to a greater extent. Child' s upbringing should responsibility should be taken care by both the parents as a happy family that spends time together gives productive environment for the children to learn and grow. If father works then mother can take care of teaching child at home. If both parents are working, they must accomodate their job timing in a way that each parent gets time to spend with the child. This way they are able to keep an eye on childs activity and emotions which might be triggered because of social messenger platforms or bullying by other kids. The scenario where child responsibilities are owned by only one parent does not get to spend time with other parent, might cause social issues or discrepancy regarding parents in a child' s mind. This might in some cases can result in pschychlogical or behavioural issues with the child. Finally, the rearing of child is responsibility of both the parents and how they manage to fulfil these depends entirely on them like other aspects of life. If one is unable to devote time due to certain reasons, task falls to another parent.
First
school for a new born is home and
parents
are the teachers. Both mother and father are
equally
responsible for
the


upbringing
of a
child
and making him/her the best citizen. In 21st century, where mother and father both are working
generally
does not
get
enough
amount of
time
to
spend
with their kids.

The environment that
parents
create at home impacts
child
to a greater extent.
Child&
#039; s upbringing should responsibility should
be taken
care by both the
parents
as a happy family that
spends
time
together gives productive environment for the children to learn and grow. If father works then mother can take care of teaching
child
at home. If both
parents
are working, they
must
accomodate
their job timing in a way that each
parent
gets
time
to
spend
with the
child
. This way they are able to
keep
an eye on
childs
activity and emotions which might
be triggered
because
of social messenger platforms or bullying by other kids.

The scenario where
child
responsibilities are
owned
by
only
one
parent
does not
get
to
spend
time
with other
parent
, might cause social issues or discrepancy regarding
parents
in a
child&
#039; s mind. This might in
some
cases can result in
pschychlogical
or
behavioural
issues with the child.

Finally
, the rearing of
child
is responsibility of both the
parents
and how they manage to fulfil
these depends
entirely
on them like other aspects of life. If one is unable to devote
time
due to certain reasons, task falls to another
parent
.
3Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
27Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9Mistakes

IELTS essay The responsibility of bringing up children should be shared equally between mother and father. v. 7

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
255 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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