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The rapid development of communication technology,such as smart phone, tablets and other mobile devices, has more disadvantages than advantages. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

The rapid development of communication technology, such as smart phone, tablets and other mobile devices, has more disadvantages than advantages. wDNl
Innovation is soaring in any sector such as medical, telecom, and so on due to modernization in technology. It is argued that, the sudden rise in development of communication technology like mobile phones, tablets and other electronic gadgets, has more cops than pros. I disagree with this claim and this essay will discuss relating aspects in detail. To begin with, there are several benefits of this kind of innovation. Firstly, its make individual's life much more easier than that in the past. Nowadays, people can get any information at anytime and from anywhere in the world. People are now able to get important News by just open one application. This is becasue of advancement in communication technology. Furthermore, it also help students in their academics. For example, scholars may be able to submit their assignments and any other tasks by just one click on the portal. This also helps individuals to keep connected with their loved ones. For example, there are plenty of Applications available in market that have a video call features. In early time, these kinds of facilities were not present, so that, they didn't have such opportunity to met their near ones through online. However, it also have number of disadvantages. On the other hand, it also affects student's study as well as their damage their mental health also. Children this modernize era are too addicted to use mobile phones and they wasting their golden time rather than learning something new using such devices. Additionally, number of youngsters are used to play number of games. As a repercussion, they may be land in some serious mental problem. For example, recent survey revealed that, 30% of youth who are usnig devices continuosly, it might possible that they have to face eye strain problem, headache, weak eye-sights. And these kind of issues are lead to severe health problems in their future. In conclusion, personally, I think that, individuals can be seen this development in constructive way rather than obstructive. But still I believe that, these kind of gadgets uses should be restricted to some boundary.
Innovation is soaring in any sector such as medical, telecom, and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on due to modernization in technology. It
is argued
that, the sudden rise in development of communication technology like mobile phones, tablets and other electronic gadgets, has more cops than pros. I disagree with this claim and this essay will discuss relating aspects in detail.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, there are several benefits of this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kind
of innovation.
Firstly
, its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
individual's life much
Use only "easier" (without 'more') when you use the comparative.
more easier
than that in the past. Nowadays,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
any information at anytime and from anywhere in the world.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
able to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
News by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
open one application. This is
Possible spelling mistake found.
becasue
of advancement in communication technology.
Furthermore
, it
also
Did you mean "helps"?
help
students in their academics.
For example
, scholars may be able to submit their assignments and any other tasks by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
one click on the portal. This
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
individuals to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
connected with their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
loved
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ones
.
For example
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
plenty
of Applications available in market that have a video call features. In early time, these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kinds
of facilities were not present,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that, they didn't have such opportunity to met their near
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ones
through online.
However
, it
also
Did you mean "has"?
have
number of disadvantages.

On the other hand
, it
also
affects student's study
as well
as their damage their mental health
also
. Children
The verb 'modernize' is plural. Did you mean: "this modernizes"? Did you use a verb instead of a noun?
this modernize
era are too addicted to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
mobile
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
phones and
Did you mean "they're wasting", "they are wasting", or "they were wasting"?
they wasting
their golden time
rather
than learning something new using such devices.
Additionally
, number of youngsters are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to play number of games. As a repercussion, they may be land in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
serious mental problem.
For example
, recent survey revealed that, 30% of youth who are
Possible spelling mistake found.
usnig
devices
Possible spelling mistake found.
continuosly
, it
The word 'possible' is a noun or an adjective. A verb or adverb is missing or misspelled here, or maybe a comma is missing.
might possible
that they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
face eye strain problem, headache, weak eye-sights. And these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kind
of issues are lead to severe health problems in their future.

In conclusion
,
personally
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that, individuals can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
this development in constructive way
rather
than obstructive.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
still
I believe that, these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kind
of gadgets
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
uses
should
be restricted
to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
boundary.

IELTS essay The rapid development of communication technology, such as smart phone, tablets and other mobile devices, has more disadvantages than advantages.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
346 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
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