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The pie charts compare the proportion of carbohydrates, protein and fat in three different diets, namely an average diet, a healthy diet, and a healthy diet for sport. v.1

The pie charts compare the proportion of carbohydrates, protein and fat in three different diets, namely an average diet, a healthy diet, and a healthy diet for sport. v. 1
Artificially intelligent robots are progressively replacing humans in the workforce. While it is possible that all menial jobs will after some time be done by robots, it is unlikely that tasks that require human contact will be taken over. This essay will discuss why eventually only very few occupations will be carried out by people Robots may eventually take over all human labour that does not require specific and complex human skills. Many companies will turn to artificial intelligence because it is far less expensive than hiring, training and employing a human. In supermarkets in Australia, for example, many cashiers have been succeeded by automated stations that cost far less than employees. In addition, these automated stations work around the clock and require no holidays. For these reasons, jobs that can be replaced by robotic intelligent will be substituted. Conversely, there are some human jobs that cannot be replaced because robots will never achieve the capacity to do them. Put simply, some jobs require a ‘human touch’. They require the sophisticated social skills of a person relating to another person. These jobs include psychology, education, medicine and social work to name but a few. Therefore, robots will never be able to achieve what has taken social evolution hundreds of thousands of years to achieve. It is increasingly likely that robots will end most human employment. Unskilled labour will eventually be done entirely by robots; however, sophisticated jobs that require human specific skills will always exist. Finally, very few jobs will be safe in an increasingly artificial intelligent workforce.
Artificially
intelligent robots are
progressively
replacing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
humans
in the workforce. While it is possible that all menial
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
will after
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
time
be done
by robots, it is unlikely that tasks that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
require
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
contact will
be taken
over. This essay will discuss why
eventually
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
few occupations will
be carried
out by
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
people


Robots may
eventually
take over all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
Possible spelling mistake. 'labour' is British English.
labour
that does not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
require
specific and complex
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
will turn to artificial intelligence
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it is far less expensive than hiring, training and employing a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
. In supermarkets in Australia,
for example
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
cashiers have
been succeeded
by automated stations that cost far less than employees.
In addition
, these automated stations work around the clock and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
require
no holidays. For these reasons,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
that can
be replaced
by robotic intelligent will
be substituted
.

Conversely
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
that cannot
be replaced
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
robots will never achieve the capacity to do them. Put
simply
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
require
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
‘human
touch’. They
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
require
the sophisticated social
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
of a person relating to another person. These
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
include psychology, education, medicine and social work to name
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
a few.
Therefore
, robots will never be able to achieve what has taken social evolution hundreds of thousands of years to achieve.

It is
increasingly
likely that robots will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
employment. Unskilled
Possible spelling mistake. 'labour' is British English.
labour
will
eventually
be done
entirely
by robots;
however
, sophisticated
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
require
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
specific
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
will always exist.
Finally
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
few
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
will be safe in an
increasingly
artificial intelligent workforce.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes
You can never understand one language until you understand at least two.
Geoffrey Willans

IELTS essay The pie charts compare the proportion of carbohydrates, protein and fat in three different diets, namely an average diet, a healthy diet, and a healthy diet for sport. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
258 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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