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The pie chart below shows the main reasons why agricultural land becomes less productive. The table shows how these causes affected three regions of the world during the 1990s. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and mak v.1

The pie chart below shows the main reasons why agricultural land becomes less productive. The table shows how these causes affected three regions of the world during the 1990s.
One of the highly debatable issues today relates to whether the environment can be only developed by the government and industries rather by its citizen. I agree that not only, the government and big industries have a responsibility towards improvement of the environment, but also people of the country should have contribution towards it. In this essay,  I will shed some light on both views. On one side of the argument, there are people who believe that the government and big industries must improve the environment. The main reason for believing this is that people have chosen their government. Therefore, the government and industries should take a major step such as avoiding pollution, proper sewer and drainage system and cleaning the common areas. Government should plant trees on both sides of roads and highway. Government should enforce to produce smoke free cars. For an example, US and Canadian government have policy to produce electric cars. Industries should have their factories away from residential area to avoid air pollution. In addition to this, the government can create awareness among people by publishing advertisement through television and newspaper etc. On the other hand, people should take their own responsibility towards improvement of the environment. People can avoid using car by using common transportation to reduce air and traffic pollution. A second point is that every citizen should use proper recycling mechanism for their garbage from their home. For an example, In summary, the government and big industries should improve the environment, however, the people of country should also take responsibilities toward an environment of their community. After considering the above mentioned points, I have logically concluded that both sides have equal responsibility towards improvement of the environment.
One of the
highly
debatable issues
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
relates to whether the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
developed by the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industries
rather
by its citizen. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industries
have a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
responsibility
towards improvement of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
of the country should have contribution towards it. In this essay,
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
I will shed
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
light on both views.

On one side of the argument, there are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who believe that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industries
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
. The main reason for believing this is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have chosen their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
.
Therefore
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industries
should take a major step such as avoiding pollution, proper sewer and drainage system and cleaning the common areas.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Government
should plant trees on both sides of roads and highway.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Government
should enforce to produce smoke free cars. For an example, US and Canadian
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
have policy to produce electric cars.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Industries
should have their factories away from residential area to avoid air pollution.
In addition
to this, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
can create awareness among
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
by publishing advertisement through television and newspaper etc.

On the other hand
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should take their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
responsibility
towards improvement of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
can avoid using car by using common transportation to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
air and traffic pollution. A second point is that every citizen should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
proper recycling mechanism for their garbage from their home. For an example,

In summary, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industries
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
,
however
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
of country should
also
take
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
responsibilities
toward an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
of their community. After considering the above mentioned points, I have
logically
concluded that both sides have equal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
responsibility
towards improvement of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay The pie chart below shows the main reasons why agricultural land becomes less productive. The table shows how these causes affected three regions of the world during the 1990s.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
285 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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