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The personal information of many individuals is held by large internet companies and organizations. Do you think the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

The majority of society nowadays tends to upload their personal information on social media without taking into account that these data are actually held by the internet These companies and firms. Although there are several advantages to this system, on the contrary, the drawbacks are ought to be heavier. Social media has assisted individuals to store essential files without fear of crashing those credentials. Individuals now can upload any file on Facebook and lock them into private settings consequently that people cannot get access to those files or end up being crashed by viruses. On the contrary, files stored on a computer hard-disk if crashed by viruses then may amount to permanent loss. In addition, another benefit is that social media apps are password protected and free. Meanwhile, if saved in a computer-locked application, people have to pay for it, whereas, saving confidential files on a social platform is comparatively safe and free. For example, my brother had stored an important document for presentation, later, he found the documents were crashed by computer viruses, therefore lost the credential never to retrieve them. On the other hand, data that is secured by a password in an internet application is prone to get leaked. Although storing data on the internet is easier and cost-efficient, private information can easily be leaked by expert hackers. For example, a lot of times celebrity nudes were exposed to various social apps by hacking their accounts. Then again, the issue that everything file uploaded and later deleted in social platforms is never actually gone. Meaning the internet organization always retains a copy of all the personal information or data that has been uploaded and then deleted. Therefore, it is never permanently gone. In conclusion, uploading, and sharing files are ought to be more harmful than beneficial. In my opinion, it is better not to share files with internet organizations as it might be prone to leakage or never deleted permanently.
The majority of society nowadays tends to upload their personal information on
social
media without taking into account that these
data
are actually held by the internet These
companies
and firms. Although there are several advantages to this system,
on the contrary
, the drawbacks are ought to be heavier.

Social media has assisted individuals to store essential
files
without fear of crashing those credentials. Individuals
now
can upload any
file
on Facebook and lock them into private settings
consequently
that
people
cannot
get
access to those
files
or
end
up
being crashed
by viruses.
On the contrary
,
files
stored on a computer
hard
-disk if crashed by viruses then may amount to permanent loss.
In addition
, another benefit is that
social
media apps are password protected and free. Meanwhile, if saved in a computer-locked application,
people
have to
pay for it, whereas, saving confidential
files
on a
social
platform is
comparatively
safe and free.
For example
, my brother had stored an
important
document for presentation, later, he found the documents
were crashed
by computer viruses,
therefore
lost the credential never to retrieve them.

On the other hand
,
data
that
is secured
by a password in an internet application is prone to
get
leaked. Although storing
data
on the internet is easier and cost-efficient, private information can
easily
be leaked
by expert hackers.
For example
,
a lot of
times celebrity nudes
were exposed
to various
social
apps by hacking their accounts. Then again, the issue that everything
file
uploaded and later deleted in
social
platforms is never actually gone. Meaning the internet organization always retains a copy of all the personal information or
data
that has
been uploaded
and then deleted.
Therefore
, it is never
permanently
gone.

In conclusion
, uploading, and sharing
files
are ought to be more harmful than beneficial. In my opinion, it is better not to share
files
with internet organizations as it might be prone to leakage or never deleted
permanently
.
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IELTS essay The personal information of many individuals is held by large internet companies and organizations. Do you think the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
323 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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