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The percentage of overweight children in Western society has increased by about 20% in the last ten years. Discuss the causes and effects of this disturbing trend.

The percentage of overweight children in Western society has increased by about 20% in the last ten years. Discuss the causes and effects of this disturbing trend. m1LL8
In this contemporary time, being overweight is becoming an issue worldwide. For over a decade, there has been an incline of approximately 20% of obese minors in the west. The reasons and outcomes of this phenomenon are to be tackled in this article. To be corpulent has been caused by massive calorie intake on every food being served. Hamburgers, pizza, soft drinks, hard liquors, and etcetera are examples of large amount of calories. All the foods and beverages have been said are commonly consumed around the globe most especially in the western areas. Once this thing occurred, there is a possibility that you will get an excess fat that can add up your weight. Daily exercise and proper maintaining of what you eat are things needed to be consider to have a healthy lifestyle. In a nutshell, obesity is unacceptable. It could result to health conditions which can severely reason of death. There are ways of getting rid of this problem. Food balance and working out are best course of action to take.
In this contemporary time, being overweight is becoming an issue worldwide. For over a decade, there has been an incline of approximately 20% of obese minors in the west. The reasons and outcomes of this phenomenon are to
be tackled
in this article. To be corpulent has
been caused
by massive calorie intake on every food
being served
. Hamburgers, pizza, soft drinks,
hard
liquors, and etcetera are examples of large amount of calories. All the foods and beverages have
been said
are
commonly
consumed around the globe most
especially
in the western areas. Once this thing occurred, there is a possibility that you will
get
an excess
fat
that can
add
up your weight. Daily exercise and proper maintaining of what you eat are things needed to be
consider
to have a healthy lifestyle. In a nutshell, obesity is unacceptable. It could result to health conditions which can
severely
reason of death. There are ways of getting rid of this problem. Food balance and working out
are best
course of action to take.
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IELTS essay The percentage of overweight children in Western society has increased by about 20% in the last ten years. Discuss the causes and effects of this disturbing trend.

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
173 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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