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the most important consideration when choosing any career or job is having a high income

the most important consideration when choosing any career or job is having a high income AnNl
It has been said that people are currently seeking for jobs provided that jobs can earn high income. Although money can solve many daily issues and bring fulfilled life for us, it is not necessarily true that high income is the most important standard whenever we are apply to any company. High salary cannot be the main factor to help us find out a sustainable job and have an imaginary future. Firstly, more teenagers are being put in the bound situation because of listening to parent thoughts. They only have some choices among the high income jobs that parents choose for them but they don’t have interest or any aptitude for it. Working or doing anything without passion rarely maintain for the long run. Moreover, some dangerous jobs can also earn much money in the short period, which draws attention of many people, especially, the young. The jobs are usually illegal, related to the crime such as, delivering the prohibited substances, being the rented killer, and other unacceptable activities. However, some people still believe that high income is a great consideration when applying for the job. They argue that money can help them deal with individual or family financial issues, especially the young who grow up in the poor family. However, you can receive incredible salary, which means that you may see many trade-offs. You have to move house to the new area, do work night shifts, deal with many deadlines and work in the bad condition. Concurrent late shifts will reduce your health and working with a yelling and ‘no’ boss may create many pressures and stress to daily life. In conclusion, people shouldn’t look at high salary to look up for career as they will meet other daily and working issues. However, good working condition and interest are considerable factors that more affect to their future working process and may create fulfilled happiness to their life.
It has
been said
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are
currently
seeking for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
provided that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
can earn
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
income
. Although money can solve
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
daily issues and bring fulfilled life for us, it is not
necessarily
true that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
income
is the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
standard whenever we are
Consider using a past participle here: "applied".
apply
to any
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
.

High salary cannot be the main factor to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
us find out a sustainable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
and have an imaginary future.
Firstly
, more
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
are
being put
in the bound situation
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of listening to parent thoughts. They
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
choices among the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
income
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
that parents choose for them
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
they don’t have interest or any aptitude for it.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Working
or doing anything without passion rarely maintain for the long run.
Moreover
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
can
also
earn much money in the short period, which draws attention of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
,
especially
, the young. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
are
usually
illegal, related to the crime such as, delivering the prohibited substances, being the rented killer, and other unacceptable activities.

However
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
still
believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
income
is a great consideration when applying for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
. They argue that money can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them deal with individual or family financial issues,
especially
the young who grow up in the poor family.
However
, you can receive incredible salary, which means that you may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
trade-offs. You
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
to the new area, do work night shifts, deal with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
deadlines and work in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
condition. Concurrent late shifts will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
your health and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
with a yelling and ‘no’ boss may create
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
pressures and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
to daily life.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
shouldn’t look at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
high
salary to look up for career as they will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
other daily and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
issues.
However
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
condition and interest are considerable factors that more affect to their future
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
process and may create fulfilled happiness to their life.
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IELTS essay the most important consideration when choosing any career or job is having a high income

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
318 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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