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The line graph shows the percentage of people of different age groups and how they rate a set of factors in terms of importance when buying a new home Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where releva v.1

The line graph shows the percentage of people of different age groups and how they rate a set of factors in terms of importance when buying a new home
According to many, public transport should be free for everyone in urban cities. The primary benefit is, people will be motivated to switch from their private vehicles to buses, trains, and tubes. Whereas, a drawback is, more burden will occur on taxpayers. An increasing number of cars and family vans on the roads is creating an enormous amount of traffic congestions these days. It leads to a tremendous amount of air and noise pollution, which is eventually harmful to the human lungs and ears, respectively. Therefore, trains and tubes running on the roads without asking for fare will motivate more people to switch from cars to trains. For example, In Holland, at present, the majority of people prefer to use no cost, government-operated trams to commute. The primary drawback of cost-free public transport by the Government in big towns will compromise the transport maintenance. Typically, the fare taken from the passengers is used to maintain the functionality of buses, trains and, trams. Therfore, in case of no capital generated from the transportation system will compromise its maintenance. As a result, the Government will gather money from people in the form of taxes. As a result, people will move back to their owned motors and bikes. . The solution to curbing the pollution; China, known for the massive traffic congestion, take an initiative to plant trees around the city to control the pollution rather than make transport free of cost. In conclusion, although free of the cost transport system will attract more dwellers, inhibit the use of cars and curb pollution, the primary demerit is more taxes will be taken.
According to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
, public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transport
should be free for everyone in urban cities. The primary benefit is,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will
be motivated
to switch from their private vehicles to buses,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trains
, and tubes. Whereas, a drawback is, more burden will occur on taxpayers.

An increasing number of cars and family vans on the roads is creating an enormous amount of traffic congestions these days. It leads to a tremendous amount of air and noise
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
, which is
eventually
harmful to the human lungs and ears,
respectively
.
Therefore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trains
and tubes running on the roads without asking for fare will motivate more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to switch from cars to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trains
.
For example
, In Holland, at present, the majority of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
prefer to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
no cost,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
-operated trams to commute.

The primary drawback of cost-free public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transport
by the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Government
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
towns will compromise the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transport
maintenance.
Typically
, the fare taken from the passengers is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to maintain the functionality of buses,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trains
and, trams.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Therfore
, in case of no capital generated from the transportation system will compromise its maintenance.
As a result
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Government
will gather money from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in the form of taxes.
As a result
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
back to their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
owned
motors and bikes.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
The solution to curbing the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
; China, known for the massive traffic congestion, take an initiative to plant trees around the city to control the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
rather
than
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transport
free of cost.

In conclusion
, although free of the cost
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transport
system will attract more dwellers, inhibit the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of cars and curb
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
, the primary demerit is more taxes will
be taken
.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay The line graph shows the percentage of people of different age groups and how they rate a set of factors in terms of importance when buying a new home

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
269 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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