Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

The importance of biodiversity is being more widely recognised as increasing numbers of species come under threat. What can be done to maintain biodiversity? v.2

The importance of biodiversity is being more widely recognised as increasing numbers of species come under threat. What can be done to maintain biodiversity? v. 2
Despite the fact we are spending funds and time for the safety of animals and birds but, I believe that we still need to do a lot more effort to keep these creatures from extinction. Infect, we are known Wildlife species are one of the fundamental factors for the environmental sustainability. Although, we have been investing reasonable capital for the shelter of wildlife and endangered species. In addition to this, different NGO's and departments for their preservation have been developed by the different sectors of society. Namely, my country Pakistan has taken strong steps to cope up with the illegal killing of wild animals and taken legal actions against the violators. Despite of all these efforts, we have lost many precious species in the past due to our negligence and careless attitude. Presently, there are a number of animals and birds, endangered by the human’s cruel behaviour. For instance, we are now on the verge of losing many wildlife animals and birds such as white hippopotamus, gorillas, Californian condor etc. , From the face of earth. For example, In Recent era, we have seen the extinction of Tasmanian tiger and dodo birds. They could have saved if the public has taken proper measures for their safety and protection. Therefore, while concluding, I highly emphasize that societies should do more struggle in order to preserve these animals and birds. Governments must develop stringent rules and regulation for their preservation alongside proper law enforcement. If we do not able to take proper actions for their shelter, then ultimately, we may face a severe environmental damage in our world that will be irreversible.
Despite the fact we are spending funds and time for the safety of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
birds
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
, I believe that we
still
need to do a lot more effort to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
these creatures from extinction.

Infect, we
are known
Wildlife species are one of the fundamental factors for the environmental sustainability. Although, we have been investing reasonable capital for the shelter of wildlife and endangered species.
In addition
to this,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
NGO's and departments for their preservation have
been developed
by the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
sectors of society.
Namely
, my country Pakistan has taken strong steps to cope up with the illegal killing of wild
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
and taken legal actions against the violators.

Did you mean "Despite" (or, alternatively, 'in spite of')?
Despite of
all these efforts, we have lost
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
precious species in the past due to our negligence and careless attitude.
Presently
, there are a number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
birds
, endangered by the human’s cruel
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
.
For instance
, we are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
on the verge of losing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
wildlife
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
birds
such as white hippopotamus, gorillas, Californian condor etc.
Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
,
From the face of earth.
For example
, In Recent era, we have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
the extinction of Tasmanian tiger and dodo
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
birds
. They could have saved if the public has taken proper measures for their safety and protection.

Therefore
, while concluding, I
highly
emphasize that societies should do more struggle in order to preserve these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
birds
.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Governments
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
develop stringent
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
and regulation for their preservation alongside proper law enforcement. If we do not able to take proper actions for their shelter, then
ultimately
, we may face
Uncountable nouns are usually not used with an indefinite article. Use simply "severe environmental damage".
a severe environmental damage
in our world that will be irreversible.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay The importance of biodiversity is being more widely recognised as increasing numbers of species come under threat. What can be done to maintain biodiversity? v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
270 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts