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The impacts of stress on health

The impacts of stress on health WgNgW
As people are living in the developing world, the pace of life is becoming faster and faster. These things put a big strain on a human to work harder and harder so as to meet the demands of society. And by that, the pressure was born and it exists everywhere, in the workplace, school, family, . . . Pressure is a natural physical and mental reaction to life experiences, although there are good sides to it, pressure brings a lot of detrimental effects to human health. The preliminary effect of pressure on human health is on the internal organs especially the liver, kidney, and heart. To put it more specifically, the pace of life is moving faster and faster, with a larger amount of work to do, people have to spend more time to cope with even working through the night. So, the biological clock of human bodies was reserved. At night time, internal organs should have time to relax and refresh for further doing but now they have to work even in their rest, and it leads to overworking. Due to that, the organs function are deficient and serious diseases are aroused. Some types of them are endocrine disorders, kidney failure, stroke, liver cancer, . . . Furthermore, stress has a huge impact on people's mentality. To clarify this point, with so much pressure coming from many sides: workplace, family, finance, daily life, . . . people will find exhausted, fatigue. And then, they find drugs, sedatives, and other medicines as a mental cure to ease their mind and satisfy themself. In long-term use, it leads to a lot of issues: mental disorder, depression, anxiety, bipolar disorder, isolation, . . . even suicide ideation. In Conclusion, If people are under strain for such a long time and they cannot find any ways to release these tensions, it can take a heavy toll on their body's health. Therefore, I believe all of us should have a healthy lifestyle and try to minimize stress in order not to affect our life
As
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are living in the developing world, the pace of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
is becoming
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
faster
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
faster
. These things put a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
strain on a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
to work harder and harder
'So as to' expresses purpose and is used in formal texts. Consider using "to"
so as to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
the demands of society. And by that, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pressure
was born
and it exists everywhere, in the workplace, school, family
Did you just mean "," or "."?
, .
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Pressure
is a natural physical and mental reaction to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
experiences, although there are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
sides to it,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pressure
brings
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
detrimental effects to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
health.

The preliminary effect of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pressure
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
health is on the internal organs
especially
the liver, kidney, and heart. To put it more
specifically
, the pace of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
is moving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
faster
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
faster
, with a larger amount of work to do,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
spend more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to cope with even working through the night.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, the biological clock of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
bodies
was reserved
. At night
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
, internal organs should have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to relax and refresh for
further
doing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
work even in their rest, and it leads to overworking. Due to that, the organs function are deficient and serious diseases
are aroused
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
types of them are endocrine disorders, kidney failure, stroke, liver cancer
Did you just mean "," or "."?
, .
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.


Furthermore
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
has a huge impact on
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's mentality. To clarify this point, with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
much
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pressure
coming from
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
sides: workplace, family, finance, daily
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
Did you just mean "," or "."?
, .
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
people
will find exhausted, fatigue. And then, they find drugs, sedatives, and other medicines as a mental cure to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ease
their mind and satisfy
The term is non-standard and not widely accepted.
themself
. In long-term
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
, it leads to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
issues: mental disorder, depression, anxiety, bipolar disorder, isolation
Did you just mean "," or "."?
, .
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
even
suicide ideation.

In Conclusion
, If
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are under strain for such a long
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
time and
they cannot find any ways to release these tensions, it can take a heavy toll on their body's health.
Therefore
, I believe all of us should have a healthy lifestyle and try to minimize
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
in order not to affect our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
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IELTS essay The impacts of stress on health

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
339 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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