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The illustrations show two stages in the development of the mobile phone. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

Nowadays, usage of technology has been increasing over the years and created a huge impact on our daily life. The conception of modern gadgets and inventions has been boundless. The given figure show us the two stages in the development of the mobile phone. The early mobile phone is 130mm long and 50mm wide as the contemprary mobile phone is 90mm long and 40mm wide, which lightier and fits in your hand comfortably. The contemprary mobile phone has advance features such as camera with video capability, internet music player and multi-player game facility. Early moblie phones have black and white display and now we have full-colour display which helps to identify icons better. The contemprary mobiles have five buttons in the centre which is more easier to operate than Early moblie phones. In addition, we can hear the other person's voice more clear in a call than before without any disturbance.
Nowadays, usage of technology has been increasing over the years and created a huge impact on our daily life. The conception of modern gadgets and inventions has been boundless. The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
figure
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
us the two stages in the development of the mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
. The early mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
is
Insert a space between the numerical value and the unit symbol: “130 mm”
130mm
long and
Insert a space between the numerical value and the unit symbol: “50 mm”
50mm
wide as the
Possible spelling mistake found.
contemprary
mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
is
Insert a space between the numerical value and the unit symbol: “90 mm”
90mm
long and
Insert a space between the numerical value and the unit symbol: “40 mm”
40mm
wide, which
Possible spelling mistake found.
lightier
and fits in your hand
comfortably
. The
Possible spelling mistake found.
contemprary
mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
has advance features such as camera with video capability, internet music player and multi-player game facility. Early
Possible spelling mistake found.
moblie
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
have black and white
Use a comma before ‘and’ if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
display and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
we have
Possible spelling mistake found.
full-colour
display which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
to identify icons better. The
Possible spelling mistake found.
contemprary
mobiles have five buttons in the
Possible spelling mistake. ‘centre’ is British English.
centre
which is
Use only “easier” (without ‘more’) when you use the comparative.
more easier
to operate than Early
Possible spelling mistake found.
moblie
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
.
In addition
, we can hear the other person's voice more
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
in a call than
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
without any disturbance.

IELTS essay The illustrations show two stages in the development of the mobile phone.

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
151 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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  • The illustrations show two stages in the development of the mobile phone. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.