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The idea that is it a good approach to te

The idea that is it a good approach to te ORpEp
The idea that is it a good approach to teach youngsters history through tours to museums or better to use other instruments for it remains the source of controversy. While some individuals believe that there should other ways to learn history, I would agree with the first opinion. To begin with, schoolchildren got used to studying various subjects reading books, and attending lectures. If studying materials are good enough and there are talented teachers at schools, it will bring excellent results in knowledge. However, using only this variant of learning, young people usually have lack visualization, which can help to memorize facts. Moreover, history lessons may be boring which makes the process of learning more complicated. Therefore, in my opinion, the modern model of education, which includes only lectures and reading materials, cannot provide complete knowledge of history. On the other, historical exhibitions in museums will show pupils visual examples of events in the past and, in turn, will give an opportunity for better understanding history. When adolescents regularly visit exhibitions, they boost their knowledge about the lifestyle of ancestors and learn not only particular dates and names of renowned figures but also understand the whole importance of previous occasions and how did they influence humanity. This is why I opine, that visiting museums should be an integral part of the syllabus. To recapitulate, despite the importance of history classes and books, tours to museums as a part of the education process can help pupils better memorize the material and increase their understanding of history and its importance.
The
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idea
that is
it a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
approach to teach youngsters
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history
through tours to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museums
or better to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
other instruments for it remains the source of controversy. While
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
individuals believe that there
It seems that a verb or adverb has been misspelled or is missing here.
should other
ways to learn
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history
, I would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the
first
opinion.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, schoolchildren
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to studying various subjects reading books, and attending lectures. If studying materials are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
and there
are talented
teachers at schools, it will bring excellent results in knowledge.
However
, using
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
this variant of learning, young
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
usually
have lack visualization, which can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to memorize facts.
Moreover
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
lessons may be boring which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
the process of learning more complicated.
Therefore
, in my opinion, the modern model of education, which includes
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
lectures and reading materials, cannot provide complete knowledge of history.

On the other, historical exhibitions in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museums
will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
pupils visual examples of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
in the past and, in turn, will give an opportunity for better understanding
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
. When adolescents
regularly
visit exhibitions, they boost their knowledge about the lifestyle of ancestors and learn not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
particular dates and names of renowned figures
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
understand the whole importance of previous occasions and how did they influence humanity. This is why I opine, that visiting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museums
should be an integral part of the syllabus.

To recapitulate, despite the importance of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
classes and books, tours to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museums
as a part of the education process can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
pupils better memorize the material and increase their understanding of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
and its importance.
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IELTS essay The idea that is it a good approach to te

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
258 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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