Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

The idea of having a single career is becoming an old fashioned one

The idea of having a single career is becoming an old fashioned one KGeG0
A person should never stop learning, thus “Learning is Earning”. Steve Jobs once said “Learning is constant as there’s always something new to learn”. But this is just an element of gaining knowledge, the main reason for getting more than one employment is inflation. Therefore people are now getting more influenced towards acquiring more than a single occupation. Money is not everything, it is the only thing because surviving life without money at this time is like surviving without water. Let’s understand with an example, if you are going out for a walk which requires no investment but the t-shirt, track pants or shorts and shoes you are wearing are all sportswear. If you are more of a health conscious person then you would require a fitness watch which costs more than your whole outfit. Likewise you might need some anti-vitamin, fish-oil tablets which keeps your health in good shape. Now as you have seen that just for walking you need various kinds of investments thus people getting more than one occupation is justified. Moreover if someone wants to perform an activity he would require skills and education about that activity. As development or upgrading occurs everyday, users also have to remain updated. So education is a never-ending process throughout your life. On the other hand as we know no one or nothing is perfect in this work, there are some demerits of working in more than one position: You will not get free time You will be restless Your health might get affected due to too much work Your quality of work may decrease due to restlessness In conclusion I would like to say that if you can manage the work without affecting your health then you are ready, otherwise with one job a penny saved is a penny earring.
A person should never
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stop
learning,
thus
“Learning is Earning”. Steve Jobs once said “Learning is constant as there’s always something new to learn”.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
this is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
an element of gaining knowledge, the main reason for getting more than one employment is inflation.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Therefore
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
getting more influenced towards acquiring more than a single occupation. Money is not everything, it is the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
thing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
surviving life without money at this time is like surviving without water.

This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Let
’s understand with an example, if you are going out for a walk which requires no investment
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the t-shirt,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
track
pants or shorts and shoes you are wearing are all sportswear. If you are more of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
conscious person then you would require a fitness
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
which costs more than your whole outfit.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Likewise
you might need
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
anti-vitamin, fish-oil tablets which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keeps
your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
shape.

This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Now
as you have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
for walking you need various kinds of investments
thus
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
getting more than one occupation
is justified
.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Moreover
if someone wants to perform an activity he would require
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
and education about that activity. As development or upgrading occurs
'Everyday' is an adjective. Did you mean "every day"?
everyday
, users
also
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
remain updated.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
education is a never-ending process throughout your life.

On the other hand
as we know no one or nothing is perfect in this work, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
demerits of working in more than one position:

You will not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
free time

You will be restless

Your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
might
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
due to too much work

Your quality of work may decrease due to restlessness

In
The comma is probably missing here: "conclusion, I".
conclusion I
would like to say that if you can manage the work without affecting your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
then you are ready,
otherwise
with one job a penny saved is a penny earring.
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS essay The idea of having a single career is becoming an old fashioned one

Essay
  American English
6 paragraphs
301 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts
  • 6band
    Computer is making us too dependent
    Computer was invented in 1837 by Charles Babbage which was a general mathematical computer with an analytical engine. Since then the innovation of computers has increased drastically, now if you want to book a ticket at the box office you need a computer. A company cannot run without a computer, a m...
  • 6band
    International sports event easing the internation tension
    International sporting events are not only very intense but also very entertaining. If you take a glance at the recent Olympics Tokyo 2020 where many countries have come to one place and are competing with the world's best of the best. Every player giving their best to win a medal for their country ...
  • 5band
    Today, parents are permitting their young ones to use smart gadgets to enhance learning. I am in favor of this statement and believe that pros of adopting latest technology in education are more as compared to few cons.
    To begin with, studying through e-tools provides students to acquire knowledge from qualified professionals across the globe. One concept can be discussed with as many as skilled teachers on different platforms. Firstly, they can access unlimited resources with latest updates in current scenario. Se...
  • 5.5band
    Learning is constant as there’s always something new to learn
    A person should never stop learning, thus “Learning is Earning”. Steve Jobs once said “Learning is constant as there’s always something new to learn”. But this is just an element of gaining knowledge, the main reason for getting more than one employment is inflation. Therefore people are now getting...
  • 6band
    dependency towards computers is that people
    Computer was invented in 1837 by Charles Babbage which was a general mathematical computer with an analytical engine. Since then the innovation of computers has increased drastically, now if you want to book a ticket at the box office you need a computer. A company cannot run without a computer, a m...
  • 5band
    Choose a present for my friend on the birthday
    personally, I would choose a book. I will mention my reasons. First of all, it's cheaper than a trip ticket. in fact, the cost of the journey is approximately 4 to 5 million including place, food, and numerous services if my friend would like to enjoy all the time. Meanwhile, a book that has excited...





Get more results for topic:
  • The idea of having a single career is becoming an old fashioned one