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The historical of Asian in Indonesia

The historical of Asian in Indonesia gDlol
Asian Culture may track back in Indonesian History that a numerous of heritage that still see in every aspects of life. There is evidence of the relics that assimilation with local culture as long as Indonesian histories, but there also consolidation with other culture such as Middle East Indian and other culture that had been entering the country since long time ago, although the culture is combination with the others, Asian Culture still have stayed with their origin that inherit from generation to generation. And also there is a lot of their culture which disappear because of the assimilation with other. For example, the language is spoken by Asian-Indonesian has changed from original although there is still have some of similarity but its unique one. Therefore, The Asian culture have been mixing and combining with local or other culture but they constantly try to keep it same from generation to generation that makes Indonesian have heterogeny ethnics and cultures.
Asian
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Culture
may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
track
back in Indonesian History that
The phrase 'a numerous of' is not correct. Use a noun, not an adjective, between 'a' and 'of'.
a numerous of
heritage that
still
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
in every
The noun should be probably in the singular form: "aspect"?
aspects
of life. There is evidence of the relics that assimilation with local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
as long as Indonesian histories,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
there
also
consolidation with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
such as Middle East Indian and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
that had been entering the country since long time ago, although the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
is combination with the others, Asian
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Culture
still
have stayed with their origin that inherit from generation to generation. And
also
there is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
which disappear
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the assimilation with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
.
For example
, the language
is spoken
by Asian-Indonesian has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
from original although there is
still
have
Consider using "some similarity" or "some of the similarity".
some of similarity
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
its unique one.
Therefore
, The Asian
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
have been mixing and combining with local or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
they
constantly
try to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
it same from generation to generation that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
Indonesian have
Possible spelling mistake found.
heterogeny
ethnics and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cultures
.
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IELTS essay The historical of Asian in Indonesia

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
159 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
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