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The growing number of overweight people is putting a strain on the health care system in an effort to deal with the health issues involved. Some people think that the best way to deal with this problem is to introduce more physical education lessons in the curriculum. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Owing to the problems which a growing population of overweight people causes for the health care system, some people think that the key to solving these issues is to have more sport and exercise in schools. I completely agree that this is the best way to tackle the issue of deteriorating public health in relation to weight. Firstly, dealing with the issues surrounding obesity and weight problem is best solved by taking a long term approach and introducing more sport and exercise in schools. This method will ensure that the next generation will be healthier and will not have such health problems. At the moment, the average child in the west does sport sedentary lifestyle. However, by incorporating more sport classes into the curriculum as encouraging extracurricular sport activities, they will undoubtedly become fitter and more active. Another point to consider is that having more sports lessons for children in schools will probably result in children developing an interest in exercise which might filter though to other members of their family and have a longer lasting effect. In other words, parents with sporty children are more likely to get involved in sport as a way of encouraging their children. By both parents and children being involved, it will ensure that children grow up to incorporate sport into their daily lives. This is certainly a natural and lasting way to improve public health. In conclusion, to deal with an increasing population of unfit, overweight people, changing the lifestyle of the coming generation by introducing sport in schools is the easiest and more effective method to use.
Owing to the problems which a growing population of overweight
people
causes for the health care system,
some
people
think
that the key to solving these issues is to have more
sport
and exercise in
schools
. I completely
agree
that this is the best way to tackle the issue of deteriorating public health in relation to weight.

Firstly
, dealing with the issues surrounding obesity and weight problem is best solved by taking a long term approach and introducing more
sport
and exercise in
schools
. This method will ensure that the
next
generation will be healthier and will not have such health problems. At the moment, the average child in the west does
sport
sedentary lifestyle.
However
, by incorporating more
sport
classes into the curriculum as encouraging extracurricular
sport
activities, they will
undoubtedly
become fitter and more active.

Another point to consider is that having more
sports
lessons for
children
in
schools
will
probably
result in
children
developing an interest in exercise which might filter though to other members of their family and have a longer lasting effect.
In other words
, parents with sporty
children
are more likely to
get
involved in
sport
as a way of encouraging their
children
. By both parents and
children
being involved
, it will ensure that
children
grow up to incorporate
sport
into their daily
lives
. This is
certainly
a natural and lasting way to
improve
public health.

In conclusion
, to deal with an increasing population of unfit, overweight
people
, changing the lifestyle of the coming generation by introducing
sport
in
schools
is the easiest and more effective method to
use
.
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IELTS essay The growing number of overweight people is putting a strain on the health care system in an effort to deal with the health issues involved. Some people think that the best way to deal with this problem is to introduce more physical education lessons in the curriculum.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
265 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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