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The given bar chart has been elaborated the percentage of male and female who working on physical activites in various age limits in Australia in 2010.

The given bar chart has been elaborated the percentage of male and female who working on physical activites in various age limits in Australia in 2010. kgnV8
In the modern world, Some people reckon that technological researches, business and educational facts must be share much as needed but others argue that most important details should be opened free to everyone. In this essay I will discuss the both topics related to sensitivity and industrial development. On the first hand, Informations on science, economics and education are so sensitive. Some innovation leads to make clean energy while the same technology used to make huge bombs. Therefore users of research details must have a self desipline to make the world a better place than destroy humans, animals, and the environment. As an example, Dr. Nobel found gun powder and in industrial revolusion, they used it as an explosive to make clear roads but the same technology used to make bulets. So information available to the public is a critical dicission to reseachers. Whereas, the global information system can enhanse plenty of industries and escalate the quality of life of humans. When it comes to Agricultural industry, facts about seeds, growing medias, environmental conditions, and lots details must be considered for a profitable and healthy food production. So researches that have done in the past is so valuble and new researchers can continue from where it stoped. Resent researches found that 80% of agricultural informations have been shared by some major leading companies to future developments. To conclude, several people recommend that some scientific, economic, and university-related researches must be share as possible but others believe that most useful facts must be available free to all, Personally, I think some dengerus details to society have to be hidden and informations that influence better livestyle must be free to the public.
In the modern world,
Some
people
reckon that technological
researches
, business and educational facts
must
be share much as needed
but
others argue that most
important
details
should
be opened
free to everyone. In this essay I will discuss the both topics related to sensitivity and industrial development.

On the
first
hand,
Informations
on science, economics and education are
so
sensitive.
Some
innovation leads to
make
clean energy while the same technology
used
to
make
huge bombs.
Therefore
users of
research
details
must
have a self
desipline
to
make
the world a better place than
destroy
humans, animals, and the environment. As an example, Dr. Nobel found gun powder and in industrial
revolusion
, they
used
it as an explosive to
make
clear
roads
but
the same technology
used
to
make
bulets
.
So
information
available to the public is a critical
dicission
to
reseachers
.

Whereas, the global
information
system can
enhanse
plenty
of industries and escalate the quality of life of humans. When it
comes
to Agricultural industry, facts about seeds, growing medias, environmental conditions, and lots
details
must
be considered
for a profitable and healthy food production.
So
researches
that have done in the past is
so
valuble
and new researchers can continue from where it
stoped
. Resent
researches
found that 80% of agricultural
informations
have
been shared
by
some
major leading
companies
to future developments.

To conclude
, several
people
recommend that
some
scientific, economic, and university-related
researches
must
be share as possible
but
others believe that most useful facts
must
be available free to all,
Personally
, I
think
some
dengerus
details
to society
have to
be hidden
and
informations
that influence better
livestyle
must
be free to the public.
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IELTS essay The given bar chart has been elaborated the percentage of male and female who working on physical activites in various age limits in Australia in 2010.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
280 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
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