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“THE EDUCATION YOU RECEIVE FROM YOUR FAMILY IS MORE IMPORTANT THAN THE EDUCATION YOU RECEIVE FROM SCHOOL

“THE EDUCATION YOU RECEIVE FROM YOUR FAMILY IS MORE IMPORTANT THAN THE EDUCATION YOU RECEIVE FROM SCHOOL PrAYE
Education comes from many places, so people can learn from their friends, their family, the television, the books or the experience of other people. Some people do not go to school but they are still successful in their life and have social status. And yet, I think the education we receive from school is more important than the education we receive from our family. Firstly, the school has professional teachers in many different fields, so they can provide the most accurate knowledge for you and you can ask them any questions. It makes you save more time to search on the internet or spend hours reading books to find out information. Secondly, the school will give you a degree when you graduate. It is important for you if you want to be a doctor, a lawyer, a scientist or any jobs that require high qualifications. Or if you have a degree, you could not become limited in what you can do with your professional lives. Thirdly, the school helps you expand relationships without your family, which is an important aspect of life. It also helps you communicate with other people more than before, you need to deal with relationships on a large number of different levels. These things create a premise for your good future laterly. In conclusion, although there are many inadequacy problems with education. I believe that the education from school is more important than the education within the family because schooling gives you things that the family can’t offer.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Education
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
from
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
places,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can learn from their friends, their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
, the television, the books or the experience of other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do not go to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
they are
still
successful in their life and have social status. And
yet
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
we receive from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
is more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
important
than the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
we receive from our family.

Firstly
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
has professional teachers in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
fields,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they can provide the most accurate knowledge for you and you can ask them any questions. It
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
you save more time to search on the internet or spend hours reading books to find out information.
Secondly
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
will give you a degree when you graduate. It is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
important
for you if you want to be a doctor, a lawyer, a scientist or any jobs that require high qualifications. Or if you have a degree, you could not become limited in what you can do with your professional
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
.
Thirdly
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
you expand relationships without your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
, which is an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
important
aspect of life. It
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
you communicate with other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
more than
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
, you need to deal with relationships on
Specify a number, remove phrase, or simply use "many" or "numerous"
a large number of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
levels. These things create a premise for your
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
future
Possible spelling mistake found.
laterly
.

In conclusion
, although there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
inadequacy problems with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
. I believe that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
is more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
important
than the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
within the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
schooling gives you
Did you mean "think" or "thinks"?
things
that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
can’t offer.
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IELTS essay “THE EDUCATION YOU RECEIVE FROM YOUR FAMILY IS MORE IMPORTANT THAN THE EDUCATION YOU RECEIVE FROM SCHOOL

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
252 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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