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the eco-generation environment

the eco-generation environment YgpOr
When I came across articles and videos of fish dying from waste in my country 5 years ago by accident, I was deeply saddened by those unethical actions. Just for some self-interest, but brutally robbed millions of creatures under the sea. Seeing the fishermen cry because their fish died, I was also very sad. because fish are the children that help them live on the land of the sea. If your unconsciousness has taken the lives of sea creatures, then you have also harmed your fellow human beings. I think you should treat your waste before discharging it into rivers, protecting the environment is protecting yourself.
When I came across articles and videos of fish dying from waste in my country 5 years ago by accident, I was
deeply
saddened by those unethical actions.
Just
for
some
self-interest,
but
brutally
robbed millions of creatures under the sea.

Seeing the fishermen cry
because
their fish
died
, I was
also
very
sad.
because
fish are the children that
help
them
live
on the land of the sea. If your unconsciousness has taken the
lives
of sea creatures, then you have
also
harmed your fellow human beings.

I
think
you should treat your waste
before
discharging it into rivers, protecting the environment is protecting yourself.
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IELTS essay the eco-generation environment

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
106 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
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