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The disadvantages of living in city

The disadvantages of living in city 7J7Rk
Nowadays, many people now choose to move out of crowded cities due to many drawbacks of city life. There are many reason why they do that and these are some of my opinion from my point of view. Living in big cities can constitute a great number of disadvantages for citizens. Firstly, there are many kinds of pollution, resulting from the growth of population density such as air pollution, water pollution, noise pollution and so on. These types of contamination will have adverse effects on people's health. For example, many citizens who are living in big cities in China are suffering from air pollution and noise pollution. As a consequently, their heath of people in these cities would be affected and they would be have many deadly disease. Secondly, the gap between the rich and the poor will be widen. If there are so many people leaving the rural areas to live in urban areas. Students are good examples here, students tend to reside in city in order to get well-paid jobs and improve their career path after graduation. As a result of this, the countrysides are poorer and the urbans are richer. Thrirdly, crime issue is another problem for people in metropolis. It can be seen that the rates of dangerous crimes are getting higher and higher. Therefore, people who live in there have to learn to protect themselves. Finally, citizens have to pay the higher cost of living than people living in suburbs. It is sure that the inflation in metropolis is always higher than in other places, this results in the higher living cost in city. Although there are many good aspects to live in big cities but it could not deniable the drawbacks of living in there.
Nowadays,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
choose to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
out of crowded
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
due to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
drawbacks of city life. There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
reason why they do that and these are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
of my opinion from my point of view.

Living in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
can constitute a great number of disadvantages for citizens.
Firstly
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
kinds of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
, resulting from the growth of population density such as air
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
, water
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
, noise
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on. These types of contamination will have adverse effects on
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's health.
For example
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
citizens who are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
in

China are suffering from air
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
and noise
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
. As a
consequently
, their heath of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
would be
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
affected and
they would be
Consider using the past participle "had"?
have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
deadly disease.
Secondly
, the gap between the rich and the poor will be
Consider using the past participle "widened"?
widen
. If there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
leaving the rural areas to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in urban areas. Students are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
examples here, students tend to reside in city in order to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
well-paid jobs and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
their career path after graduation.
As a result
of this, the countrysides are poorer and the
Possible spelling mistake found.
urbans
are richer.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Thrirdly
, crime issue is another problem for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in metropolis. It can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that the rates of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
crimes are getting higher and higher.
Therefore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in there
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
learn to protect themselves.
Finally
, citizens
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
pay the higher cost of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in suburbs.
In English, people don't say 'it is sure'. They say, 'it is certain that'. Did you mean "it is certain"?
It is sure
that the inflation in metropolis is always higher than in other places, this results in the higher
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
cost in city.

Although there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
aspects to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it
It seems that a verb or adverb has been misspelled or is missing here.
could not deniable
the drawbacks of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in there.
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IELTS essay The disadvantages of living in city

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
291 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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