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The cots of international travel are decreasing and tourism is growing. What are the advantages and disadvantages of increasing tourism activity in different countries. v.2

The cots of international travel are decreasing and tourism is growing. What are the advantages and disadvantages of increasing tourism activity in different countries. v. 2
With globalized world, people have tendency to spend more time and money getting away from the noisy of daily life, hence, traveling around the world becomes more and more popular trend. The costs of tourism going oversea are cheaper then previously resulted in a boost to international tourism. This essay will discuss both pros and cons of this issue. To begin with, it is undeniable that there are some positive influences of increasing global travel on both destinations and travelers. First and foremost, the strong development of tourism creates countless opportunities about careers for residents. For instance, to attract more tourists to visit one place, the country must invest more budget on building resorts, hotels or other services. As a result, habitants will be hired for these jobs. One other advantage is that having experienced phenomenal growth in tourism will contribute a huge amount of revenue on country' s economy. The fact shows that a decrease in price of worldwide package holidays means that there is a boost tourism, therefore, the economy of this nation will develop significantly. In addition, in terms of travelers, it is a good chance for them to access a world of culture. More places they go, more culture they absorb. On the other hand, there are also some drawbacks of raising tourism. Firstly, the growth of tourism affect negatively on environment such as the pollution of air, land or beach. For example, in the height of tourist season, beaches are always swarming with holidaymakers, they sometimes litter the garbage like plastic bags, canned or other rubbish along the seashore. This not only deteriorate the environment of tourist destinations but also make the image of these places worse. Moreover, the diversity of tourists can bring bad behavior that impact adversely on local culture. For example, tourists who come from some different countries can have some words or manners which are not suitable with cultural local. In conclusion, although the growing trend of tourism industry has a lot of benefits for many countries, there are some disadvantages that global travel brings to these nations. I strongly believe that the government should impose some regulations for the tourism sectors to make the most of tourism' s profits.
With globalized world,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
have tendency to spend more time and money getting away from
The phrase 'the noisy of' is not correct. Use a noun, not an adjective, between 'the' and 'of'.
the noisy of
daily life,
hence
, traveling around the world becomes more and more popular trend. The costs of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
going oversea are
Did you mean "cheaper than"?
cheaper then
previously resulted in a boost to international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
. This essay will discuss both pros and cons of this issue.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, it is undeniable that there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
influences of increasing global travel on both destinations and travelers.
First
and foremost, the strong development of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
creates countless opportunities about careers for residents.
For instance
, to attract more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
to visit one place, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
invest more budget on building resorts, hotels or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
services.
As a result
, habitants will
be hired
for these jobs. One
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
advantage is that having experienced phenomenal growth in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
will contribute a huge amount of revenue on
Possible spelling mistake found.
country&
#039; s economy. The fact
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
that a decrease in price of worldwide package holidays means that there is a boost
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
,
therefore
, the economy of this nation will develop
significantly
.
In addition
, in terms of travelers, it is a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
chance for them to access a world of culture. More places they go, more culture they absorb.

On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand, there are
also
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
drawbacks of raising
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
.
Firstly
, the growth of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
affect
negatively
on environment such as the pollution of air, land or beach.
For example
, in the height of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourist
season, beaches are always swarming with holidaymakers, they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
litter the garbage like plastic bags, canned or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
rubbish along the seashore. This not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
deteriorate the environment of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourist
destinations
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
the image of these places worse.
Moreover
, the diversity of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
can bring
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
behavior that impact
adversely
on local culture.
For example
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
from
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
can have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
words or manners which are not suitable with cultural local.

In conclusion
, although the growing trend of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
industry has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
benefits for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
disadvantages that global travel brings to these nations. I
strongly
believe that the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should impose
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
regulations for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
sectors to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
the most of
Possible spelling mistake found.
tourism&
#039; s profits.
17Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
23Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Mistakes

IELTS essay The cots of international travel are decreasing and tourism is growing. What are the advantages and disadvantages of increasing tourism activity in different countries. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
369 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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