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The best way to reduce the number of traffic accidents is to raise age limit for the younger drivers and to lower age limit for the aged ones. Do you agree?

The best way to reduce the number of traffic accidents is to raise age limit for the younger drivers and to lower age limit for the aged ones. Do you agree? lQpD
Nowadays, inimical accidents happens because of heavy traffic are rising. Most of the accidents causes detrimental injuries ir even to death. Some people tend that the age limit on youngsters are beneficial as well as age limit is also good for curb the accident. This eassy will explain above reason. To begin with, age limit is not option for stop accidents even many youngsters are master in driving. By this we mean that youngsters are tend to more daring and they also tend to perilous drunk driving cost people their lives. For example, researches found that many accidents causes by unexperienced person such as, young people. Secondly, government should pay attention for conduct driving classes for youngsters for long periods. This will proffer them a clear picture of how accidents happen and petronize them about the safety of others on road. Furthermore, aged limit is not a second option of causes accidents. Numerous aged people can drive safely, moreover they can capable to drive. Government should check their physical effects such as eye sights, hearing loss. It will augment the safety and diminish the accidents. But the more scrupulous steps we take, more accidents we can avoid. To conclude, i tend to deem that government should be aware of accidents of young people and they also organise physical checkup for age limit people. So they both have a knowledge and capability to drive they can curb the accidents.
Nowadays, inimical
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accidents
happens
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because
of heavy traffic are rising. Most of the
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accidents
causes detrimental injuries
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ir
even to death.
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Some
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people
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tend
that the
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age
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limit
on youngsters are beneficial
as well
as
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age
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limit
is
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
for curb the
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accident
. This
Possible spelling mistake found.
eassy
will
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explain
above reason. To
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begin
with,
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age
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limit
is not option for
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stop
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accidents
even
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many
youngsters are master in driving. By this we mean that youngsters are
Consider using a past participle here: "tended".
tend
to more
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
daring and
they
also
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tend
to perilous drunk driving cost
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people
their
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lives
.
For example
, researches found that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
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accidents
causes by
Possible spelling mistake found.
unexperienced
person such as, young
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people
.
Secondly
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should pay attention for conduct driving classes for youngsters for long periods. This will proffer them a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
picture of how
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accidents
happen and
Possible spelling mistake found.
petronize
them about the safety of others on road.
Furthermore
, aged
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limit
is not a second option of causes
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accidents
. Numerous aged
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people
can drive
safely
,
moreover
they
It seems that a verb or adverb has been misspelled or is missing here.
can capable
to drive.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Government
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
check
their physical effects such as
This word is usually spelt together: "eyesights".
eye sights
, hearing loss. It will augment the safety and diminish the
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accidents
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
the more scrupulous steps we take, more
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accidents
we can avoid.
To conclude
,
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
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tend
to deem that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should be aware of
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accidents
of young
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
people and
they
also
Possible spelling mistake. 'organise' is British English.
organise
physical checkup for
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age
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
limit
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people
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
they both have a knowledge and capability to drive they can curb the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
accidents
.
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IELTS essay The best way to reduce the number of traffic accidents is to raise age limit for the younger drivers and to lower age limit for the aged ones. Do you agree?

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
238 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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