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The average standard of people's health is likely to be lower in the future than it is now. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

The average standard of people's health is likely to be lower in the future than it is now. with this statement? OBGM
As the phrase says, "Health is Wealth", a person's health plays a vital part in their life. Many of us believe that compared to today's scenario, our average standard of health may diminish in the coming days. This essay will emphasize on why there is a fair chance of increase in our health risks in the future. When it comes to our health, there are ample of people who ignore it and take it for granted. In the fast paced lifestyles, people hardly get time to invest in their health and enjoy the fast food culture where they do not think once before consuming junk food. This has made their health vulnerable. Moreover, the hustle-bustle of city life has also snatched away the quality time which people used to spend on their body by working out. Now a days, the number of people engaging themselves in exercise and yoga has been drastically decreased. Such a culture is now inculcated in our lifestyle which, no doubt, put the average standard of people's health at high risk. Apart from the metropolitan lifestyle, we are also unaware about the quality of the air we are breathing as well as the water we are drinking. Due to extreme industrialization and deforestation, the environmental pollution is at its zenith which is taking a toll on our health. According to several studies, the capital of India, New Delhi, is the most polluted city in the world and most of the people die because of extremely poor air quality. The lifestyle we are opting to lead, such as consumption of junk food and not practicing physical activities, along with the lifestyle we are forced to lead, for example, surviving in an environment full of pollution, are resulting in lowering the standard of our health. Therefore, I completely agree with the fact that the coming years will devastate our average health standard.
As the phrase says,
Use a smart opening quote here: "“".
"
Health is Wealth
Use a smart closing quote here: "”".
"
, a person's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
plays a vital part in their life.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
of us believe that compared to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
's scenario, our average
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
standard
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
may diminish in the coming days. This essay will emphasize on why there is a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fair
chance of increase in our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risks
in the future.

When it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
to our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
, there are ample of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ignore
it and take it for granted. In the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
paced
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lifestyles
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
hardly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
time to invest in their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
and enjoy the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
food culture where they do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
once
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
consuming junk food. This has made their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
vulnerable.
Moreover
, the hustle-bustle of city life has
also
snatched away the quality time which
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to spend on their body by working out.
Did you mean "nowadays"?
Now a days
, the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
engaging themselves in exercise and yoga has been
drastically
decreased. Such a culture is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
inculcated in our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lifestyle
which, no doubt, put the average
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
standard
of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
at high
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risk
.

Apart from the metropolitan
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lifestyle
, we are
also
unaware about the quality of the air we are breathing
as well
as the water we are drinking. Due to extreme industrialization and deforestation, the environmental pollution is at its zenith which is taking a toll on our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
. According to several studies, the capital of India, New Delhi, is the most polluted city in the world and most of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
die
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of
extremely
poor air quality.

The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lifestyle
we are opting to lead, such as consumption of junk food and not practicing physical activities, along with the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lifestyle
we
are forced
to lead,
for example
, surviving in an environment full of pollution, are resulting in lowering the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
standard
of our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
.
Therefore
, I completely
Consider using "agree that".
agree with the fact that
the coming years will devastate our average
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
standard
.
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IELTS essay The average standard of people's health is likely to be lower in the future than it is now. with this statement?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
314 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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