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The amount of time spend on sport and exercise should be increased in school in order to tackle the problem of overweight children? Do you think this the best way to deal with the problem? What other solutions can you suggest?

Nowadays, children who are overweight should spend too much time on sport and exercise so as to overcome this issue. Although I consider that active exercises can reduce children’s weight, eating healthy may also be beneficial. This essay will analyze the importance of sport activities and eating habits to demonstrate points and elucidate facts. To commence with, the increasing number of children are suffering from overweight which leads to be obese. A school of thought claims that enhancing the number of exercises at school may reduce the proportion of overweight children. A survey conducted by the Baku Health Organization pointed out that more than 250 sport equipment have been introduced for schools in order to encourage children. Therefore, it can be unrealistic to expect children to lose weight unless enhancing sport facilities. On the flip side, eating healthy vegetables and fruits should be increased due to the fact that if children keep balance between doing sports and intaking healthy foods, the consequences of implements will accelerate. There is ample evidence to suggest that the core of the overweight problem originates from consuming junk food and sugar. For instance, my cousin has been suffering from obesity since his childhood, but changing eating habits helps him to get rid of unwanted weights. Ultimately, intaking healthy products can also assist to deal with overweight issues. In conclusion, it is generally acknowledged that increasing sport facilities in a school life might be helpful to reduce the proportion of overweight children. Not only doing exercises but also increasing healthy products at schools may bring significant results.
Nowadays,
children
who are
overweight
should spend too much time on
sport
and
exercise
so as to
overcome this issue. Although I consider that active
exercises
can
reduce
children’s
weight,
eating
healthy
may
also
be beneficial. This essay will analyze the importance of
sport
activities and
eating
habits to demonstrate points and elucidate facts.

To commence with, the increasing number of
children
are suffering from
overweight
which leads to be obese. A
school
of
thought
claims that enhancing the number of
exercises
at
school
may
reduce
the proportion of
overweight
children
. A survey conducted by the Baku Health Organization pointed out that more than 250
sport
equipment have
been introduced
for
schools
in order to encourage
children
.
Therefore
, it can be unrealistic to
expect
children
to lose weight unless enhancing
sport
facilities.

On the flip side,
eating
healthy
vegetables and fruits should
be increased
due to the fact that if
children
keep
balance between doing
sports
and
intaking
healthy
foods, the consequences of implements will accelerate. There is ample evidence to suggest that the core of the
overweight
problem originates from consuming junk food and sugar.
For instance
, my cousin has been suffering from obesity since his childhood,
but
changing
eating
habits
helps
him to
get
rid of unwanted weights.
Ultimately
,
intaking
healthy
products can
also
assist to deal with
overweight
issues.

In conclusion
, it is
generally
acknowledged that increasing
sport
facilities in a
school
life might be helpful to
reduce
the proportion of
overweight
children
. Not
only
doing
exercises
but
also
increasing
healthy
products at
schools
may bring significant results.
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IELTS essay The amount of time spend on sport and exercise should be increased in school in order to tackle the problem of overweight children? Do you think this the best way to deal with the problem? What other solutions can you suggest?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
261 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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