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The amount of electronic waste is continuously growing. What do you think are the reasons behind and suggest some of the ways to deal with it.

The amount of electronic waste is continuously growing. What do you think are the reasons behind and suggest some of the ways to deal with it. oElYb
It is undeniably true that billions of tons electronic garbage is thrown annually around the world and it's quantity is escalating each passing day. It has become a worldwide concern because of uncommon reasons which I will mention forward along with possible solutions in upcoming paragraphs. To embark on, there are a couple of causes of disposing digital devices which need to be highlighted. First and foremost, purchasing latest products rather than repairing and utilizing previous one, when they break down. This is happening because of advertisements. Companies attract people especially youngster towards their gadgets by telling advanced features, designs and benefits in adds. Consequently, individuals cannot help themselves to buy lucrative devices. In addition, people want to retain their status among their near and dear ones. Therefore, they splash out on luxurious products which not only have stylish appearance, but also enhance their personality. As a result, they compromise with the quality of the unnecessary products ranging from watches, cellphones, music systems to computers and laptops. On the solution side, there are some significant steps to tackle this trouble which can be implemented. Firstly, populace must change their extravagant habits of getting unimportant things. This way, they can not only save money for rainy days, but also can keep their surrounding neat and clean. Secondly, government ought to organize some seminars to raise awareness among the public about harmful impacts of their negative behavior of throwing electronic waste. It has been proved by ecologists that India produces around 3 million tones e-waste annually which causes severe circumstances for environment. In order to reduce this risk some lessons can be taught such as reduce, reuse and recycle. In conclusion, even though electronic garbage is a prominent issue because of people's bad habits, it can be fixed to some extent by following aforementioned suggestions.
It is
undeniably
true that billions of tons electronic garbage
is thrown
annually
around the world and it's quantity is escalating each passing day. It has become a worldwide concern
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of uncommon reasons which I will mention forward along with possible solutions in upcoming paragraphs.

To embark on, there are a couple of causes of disposing digital devices which need to
be highlighted
.
First
and foremost, purchasing
A determiner is probably missing here: "the latest".
latest
products
rather
than repairing and utilizing previous one, when they break down. This is happening
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of advertisements.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Companies
attract
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
especially
youngster towards their gadgets by telling advanced features, designs and benefits in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
adds
.
Consequently
, individuals cannot
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
themselves to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
lucrative devices.
In addition
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
want to retain their status among their near and dear ones.
Therefore
, they splash out on luxurious products which not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
have stylish appearance,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
enhance their personality.
As a result
, they compromise with the quality of the unnecessary products ranging from
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watches
, cellphones, music systems to computers and laptops.

On the solution side, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
significant steps to tackle this trouble which can
be implemented
.
Firstly
, populace
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
their extravagant habits of getting unimportant things. This way, they can not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
save money for rainy days,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
their surrounding neat and clean.
Secondly
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
ought to organize
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
seminars to raise awareness among the public about harmful impacts of their
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
behavior of throwing electronic waste. It has
been proved
by ecologists that India produces around 3 million tones e-waste
annually
which causes severe circumstances for environment. In order to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risk
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
lessons can
be taught
such as
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
, reuse and recycle.

In conclusion
,
even though
electronic garbage is a prominent issue
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
habits, it can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fixed
to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
extent by following aforementioned suggestions.
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IELTS essay The amount of electronic waste is continuously growing. What do you think are the reasons behind and suggest some of the ways to deal with it.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
303 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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