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The advantages and disadvantages of living in a foreign country

Everyone in the world thought about their dream job. Some people want to work in big companies, build a successful career, but others dream about own business, enterprises. There are advantages and disadvantages of being your own boss. Firstly, having your own business has many positive sides. One of the main benefits is that you can bring all your ideas to life. When something new comes to your mind, in any case you can make it in real life. Business sphere is one of the spheres where you can expresses yourself, feel independence and have creative freedom and personal satisfaction. Secondly, you can control your salary. In business, boss chooses salary for all workers, it is very easy, because you can look at performance of workers and decrease or increase amount of salary. Beside the advantages, being your own boss has many negative sides. One of the main disadvantages it is big risks. People take a risk when wants to open own enterprise, because there are no base and confidence for the future. Dreams can become to nightmare without working hard, financial investments and good service. Secondly, you always need to improve your business with new ideas and investments. Enterprise will start bring a less amount of money and become boring without any improvements. Therefore, if you want to be businessmen, you need to have good workers that will help you to develop enterprise. Finally, having your own business and be your own boss have many benefits and opposites. In my opinion, create your own enterprise is it a huge opportunity and every businessmen went through difficulties.
Everyone in the world
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
about their dream job.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
want to work in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
, build a successful career,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
others dream about
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
enterprises
. There are advantages and disadvantages of being your
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
boss.

Firstly
, having your
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
sides. One of the main benefits is that you can bring all your
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
to life. When something new
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
to your mind, in any case you can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
it in real life.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Business
sphere is one of the spheres where you can
The modal verb ‘can’ requires the verb’s base form.
expresses
yourself, feel independence and have creative freedom and personal satisfaction.
Secondly
, you can control your salary. In
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
, boss chooses salary for all workers, it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
easy,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
you can look at performance of workers and decrease or increase amount of salary.

Beside the advantages, being your
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
boss has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
sides. One of the main disadvantages it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risks
.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
take a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risk
when wants to open
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
enterprise
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
there are no base and confidence for the future. Dreams can become to nightmare without working
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
, financial investments and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
service.
Secondly
, you always need to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
with new
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
and investments.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Enterprise
will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
bring a less amount of money and become boring without any improvements.
Therefore
, if you want to be businessmen, you need to have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
workers that will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
you to develop enterprise.

Finally
, having your
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
and be your
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
boss have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
benefits and opposites. In my opinion, create your
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
enterprise
is it a huge opportunity and every
The noun should probably be in the singular form: “businessman”?
businessmen
went through difficulties.
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IELTS essay The advantages and disadvantages of living in a foreign country

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
267 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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