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Music and Relaxation. Some people think that the most important function of music is to help people relax. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Nowadays, people are so fond of music and they love to hear it in almost all places such as in restaurants, bars, pubs, shopping malls etc. Generally music is having a magical rhythm and power to sooth human's hard feelings and stress. This will help them to relax and I strongly on it. There are several types of music such as Classical, Pop, Jazz, rock etc. Each music has various effects on people mood. For example, I would like to share my experience which I had with my society in India. In my country, people love to hear music. There are several television channels telecasting various types of music. Early morning, people love to hear soft melodies and prayer songs. People believe this is a great way of starting their day more energetically. Before going to sleep they love to hear at least few good night songs to relax and to get a sound sleep. Music will also help people to keep their blood pressure normal by maintaining the stress level. Nowadays most of the people are working in a competitive and stressful environment and music is one of the easiest way to calm themselves and relax. Because of this reason many psychiatrist are advising their patients to read books and to hear music to control their hypertension. To conclude, music is one of the great gift that is readily available for everyone, if the music is wisely used by hr people it will definitely lead their life in a meaningful and more colourful manner.
Nowadays,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
fond of
Use a comma before ‘and’ if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
music and
they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
love
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hear
it in almost all places such as in restaurants, bars, pubs, shopping malls etc.
Generally
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
is having a magical rhythm and power to sooth human's
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
feelings and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
. This will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them to relax and I
strongly
on it. There are several types of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
such as Classical, Pop, Jazz, rock etc. Each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
has various effects on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
mood.
For example
, I would like to share my experience which I had with my society in India. In my country,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
love
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hear
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
. There are several television channels telecasting various types of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
. Early morning,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
love
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hear
soft melodies and prayer songs.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
believe this is a great way of starting their day more
energetically
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Before
going to sleep they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
love
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hear
at least few
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
night songs to relax and to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a sound sleep.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Music
will
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
their blood pressure normal by maintaining the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
level. Nowadays most of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are working in a competitive and stressful environment and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
is one of the easiest way to calm themselves and relax.
Because of this
reason
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
The plural determiner “all” expects a plural noun.
psychiatrist
are advising their patients to read books and to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hear
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
to control their hypertension.

To conclude
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
is one of the great gift
that is
readily
available for everyone, if the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
is
wisely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
by hr
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
it will definitely lead their life in a meaningful and more
Possible spelling mistake. ‘colourful’ is British English.
colourful
manner.
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IELTS essay Music and Relaxation. Some people think that the most important function of music is to help people relax.

Essay
  American English
2 paragraphs
255 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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