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The advantage of Self-Employed

The advantage of Self-Employed m8Geq
In recent years, self-employment has become an option for more people instead of being employed in an organization. The main reason behind this preference is the flexible which people get by working independently. Despite of the advantage, being self-employed has some drawbacks. Firstly, the two most important reasons why someone may choose to work independently are the possibility to work from anywhere and have a flexible schedule. Due to the advancement of technology and we are all now connected via the internet, self-employed people can work from anywhere for clients from all over the world. Furthermore, they can adjust their working schedule according to their needs. For instance, it is possible for a person who does not like working early in the morning to start working at 10. On the other hand, self-employment also come with some disadvantages. Self-employed usually do not have a fix income. It depends on how many projects or work they take. For entrepreneurs, they also need to be more creative so they can compete and adapt in a fast-changing business environment. Moreover, an uncertain income and situation means more stress and more time on the job. For example, working hours can be the same or even longer for self-employed people. With the flexibility they get, they tend to think about work all the time and do their work until late at night. To sum up, many people choose for being self-employed because they can work from anywhere with flexible schedule instead of having a rigid one. However, it can have its drawbacks. Since the income is not fixed, it can lead to more stress and working hours.
In recent years, self-employment has become an option for more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
instead
of
being employed
in an organization. The main reason behind this preference is the flexible which
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
independently
.
Did you mean "Despite" (or, alternatively, 'in spite of')?
Despite of
the advantage, being self-employed has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
drawbacks.

Firstly
, the two most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
reasons why someone may choose to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
independently
are the possibility to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
from anywhere and have a flexible schedule. Due to the advancement of
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
technology and
we are all
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
connected via the internet, self-employed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
from anywhere for clients from all over the world.
Furthermore
, they can adjust their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
schedule according to their needs.
For instance
, it is possible for a person who does not like
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
early in the morning to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
at 10.

On the other hand
, self-employment
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
disadvantages. Self-employed
usually
do not have a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fix
income. It depends on how
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
projects or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
they take. For entrepreneurs, they
also
need to be more creative
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they can compete and adapt in a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
-changing business environment.
Moreover
, an uncertain income and situation means more
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
and more time on the job.
For example
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
hours can be the same or even longer for self-employed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. With the flexibility they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
, they tend to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
all the time and do their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
until late at night.

To sum up,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
choose for being self-employed
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
from anywhere with flexible schedule
instead
of having a rigid one.
However
, it can have its drawbacks. Since the income is not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fixed
, it can lead to more
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
hours.
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IELTS essay The advantage of Self-Employed

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
272 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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  • Meet the criteria
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