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Teleworking has been on the increase in recent years. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Teleworking has been on the increase in recent years. Do you think this is a positive or negative development? MM81N
Teleworking, also known as the activity of working at home, while communicating with the office by phone, email or using the Internet, has been significantly popular in recent years, especially during the COVID-19 pandemic. From my standpoint, the positive features of the development will outweigh the negative ones. To begin with, there will be drawbacks to this new, modern development. First, troubles can be caused by internet connection, an unstable connection has a huge impact on the performance of employees and this can lead to low quality and quantity of products. Second, workers may find it difficult working without collaboration as collaboration an essential feature for any workplace. Employees may suffer from stress, mental disorders, etc… there will be disagreements among team members and productivity will be reduced. Teleworking, which means working at home, can cause distractions, such as children running around, TV is on with noises, pets, etc… These distractions do not have a positive impact on the workers, so this can lead to significant degradation in the quality of work and products. On the other hand, this development can have more positive aspect than negative ones. Firstly, work productivity can be increased while maintaining the staff’s high level of satisfaction. Job satisfaction can be considered as one of the most important features that a workplace should provide to its workers. Secondly, teleworking can build a flexible work culture and employees can work outside standard working hours. For instance, Dell Company created a flexible workplace that resulted in $12 million savings in 2014, in fact, Dell is among the companies offering flexible work schedules and arrangements, allowing employees to work remotely some or all of the time, and at variable hours. Thirdly, flexible work options can have a huge impact on employee satisfaction, Dell workers are reported to be highly satisfied while they do not need a large workspace and their products meet the business meets. In conclusion, teleworking is a new and modern type of work that companies could apply as the advantages easily outweigh the disadvantages. Teleworking can especially be enhance during the current COVID-19 pandemic, this not only helps maintain the economic incomes while keeping workers safe at home in the pandemic.
Teleworking,
also
known as the activity of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
at home, while communicating with the office by phone, email or using the Internet, has been
significantly
popular in recent years,
especially
during the COVID-19 pandemic. From my standpoint, the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
features of the development will outweigh the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
ones.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, there will be drawbacks to this new, modern development.
First
, troubles can
be caused
by internet connection, an unstable connection has a huge impact on the performance of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
and this can lead to low quality and quantity of products. Second,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workers
may find it difficult
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
without collaboration as collaboration an essential feature for any workplace.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Employees
may suffer from
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
, mental disorders, etc… there will be disagreements among team members and productivity will be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
. Teleworking, which means
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
at home, can cause distractions, such as children running around, TV is on with noises, pets, etc… These distractions do not have a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
impact on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workers
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
this can lead to significant degradation in the quality of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
and products.

On the other hand
, this development can have more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
aspect than
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
ones.
Firstly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
productivity can
be increased
while maintaining the staff’s high level of satisfaction. Job satisfaction can
be considered
as one of the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
features that a workplace should provide to its
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workers
.
Secondly
, teleworking can build a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
flexible
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
culture and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
outside standard
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
hours.
For instance
, Dell
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Company
created a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
flexible
workplace that resulted in $12 million savings in 2014, in fact, Dell is among the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
offering
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
flexible
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
schedules and arrangements, allowing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
remotely
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
or all of the time, and at variable hours.
Thirdly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
flexible
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
options can have a huge impact on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employee
satisfaction, Dell
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workers
are reported
to be
highly
satisfied while they do not need a large workspace and their products
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
the business meets.

In conclusion
, teleworking is a new and modern type of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
could apply as the advantages
easily
outweigh the disadvantages. Teleworking can
especially
be
Consider using a past participle here: "enhanced".
enhance
during the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
COVID-19 pandemic, this not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
maintain the economic incomes while keeping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workers
safe at home in the pandemic.
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IELTS essay Teleworking has been on the increase in recent years. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
366 words
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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